Thepfaffys

What of a bits...

2011-09-18T21:48:00.002-05:00

I let the kids play on my iTouch. Mostly Angry Birds and a Star Wars game. They all play and love it. A few weeks ago I found Ian in the closet "playing". Turns out he was watching Tombstone. He would fast forward the talking parts and go straight to the gunfights. For those of you that don't know, the movie is about Wyatt Earp, his brothers and Doc Holliday and their time in Tombstone. The fight at the OK Corral and all that. The bad guys are a group of truly mean dudes who call themselves Cowboys. Wyatt, Doc and the boys prevail in the end but not before a lot of bloodshed. The leader of the Cowboys wears a red shirt.

I told him that was not a movie for children only mommies and daddies. (Is that how you spell those?) He was disappointed because apparently he had been watching that movie for a while. I said no more and that was the end of it...or so I thought.

We were out at dinner the other night and right in the middle of dinner he turns to me and says in a whisper:

Daddy? What did the Cowboy in the red shirt mean when he said, "What of a bits?

Needless to say I was ROFLMAO. I explained to him that was a bad word and that was why he couldn't watch the movie.

Madison had a slumber party for her 9th birthday last Friday. Ian and I left on a guys night out. We ate at 5 guys burgers just to keep the mood. We drove over to Mom and Dad's to spend the night in the camper and watch Master and Commander. On the way over the traffic was horrible. Grapefest was going on and it was raining. Needless to say, the bad drivers were out in force. During the drive I said to Ian there sure were a lot of people out tonight. From the backseat looking out the window and without skipping a beat he said, "And a lot of morons."

I guess they do listen.

I told this story to my brother Steve and he said one day they were going to school and some bozo cut Steve off. About 2 minutes later Christian asked:

Dad? What does funky moron mean?"

Pfaff Pfest XVI is in the books...

2011-09-05T10:32:00.002-05:00

what a blast!

I can speak for all 10 attendees when I say a good time was had by all. We sang. We talked. We laughed. We cried. (mostly during the game) And we laughed some more.

Got to spend some good time with my nephews, Tod, Eric, Kody and Craig. Had some deep conversations about love and life. Best thing was their dads going to bed early. Not that they wouldn't have been as open if they were around but it may have made it a little easier. Regardless, Saturday night was fun and somehting I will remember for a long time.

Who had a good time on Saturday night hanging with his brother Steve and his nephews Tod, Craig and Eric...

Again it seemed like the game got in the way of the good time. We made a game of it but we were too little too late. 0-1 to start the season. Welcome to UCLA football.

Steve and I played golf on Friday at the #1 ranked course in Texas. It was truly awesome. Pine tree lined fairways. Tough, tough greens. I hit the ball pretty well but putted like a blind man. It didn't matter though. It was spectacular anyway.

Next year it's either Colorado or Oregon. Wherever the wind takes us the family will be there.

Madison was baptized on Sunday...

2011-08-18T10:48:00.003-05:00

what a great day.

Amidst the constant hitting and kicking and yelling among the siblings, it makes us feel like we are at least doing something right. She knows Jesus and loves Him and wants to live her life by His word.

It's all good. But not too good. (Right Sam?)

Aside: I know why Jesus was an only child. I just can't see him calling his sister a poopy head. Or kicking her in the nose because she touched his army men.

I wrote a song for the occasion. The chorus came to me about two months ago. In church, I just started to hear these words in my head:

On water He walks
From water to wine
Of water and the Spirit
He saves this sinner's life

Not long after I wrote down these words Madison came to us and asked about Baptism. I finished the song soon thereafter. Jim Henderson and I sat down and knocked out the chords in about 45 minutes. I then went home and created the melody.

I put in some words from a David Wilcox song called "Break in the Cup". I planned on looking at Mike and Steve when I came to that part and smile. I thought I might laugh but I did it anyway.

Much to my surprise, I started to choke up. Not good when you are singing. I had to look away post haste. Which I did and made it through the song. Whew!

The coolest thing happened after the song.

Aside: The whole family was there sans the Phoenix Pfaffenbergers. The church was 1/4 full with just us. Pretty cool.

From my view in the choir, I could see Steve with Tod and Craig sitting right behind him and Mike sitting right behind them. I sat down and looked up at them and as if on cue, they all nodded their heads in perfect unison as if to say, "Well done, sir."

Unscripted, raw emotion. Family.

Everyone came back to the house. The newly painted house because...that's another blog. Simple fare; sandwiches, chips, potato salad, asian coleslaw, fruit, olive tray, cookies and cheesecake. Some swam, some played, all visited.

The words to Madison's song

On water He walked
To reveal Himself to them
The calming sea proved
He is the Son of man

From water to wine
His life forever changed
He set His fate in stone
His promise began that day

Chorus
On water He walks
From water to wine
Of water and the Spirit
He saves this sinner's life

Bridge
There's a break in the cup that holds love
Inside us all
For there's a break in the cup that holds love
We must go to the waterfall

Over time
Water wears the stone
Through the perfect grace of Christ
Water brings us home

Nothing better...

2011-08-13T06:56:00.002-05:00

than a long drive to clear the head.

I drove up to Tulsa this week for work. Trust me I wouldn't go if I didn't have to.

Aside:

Everytime I want to type an apostrophe I end up typing a semi-colon instead. I will give you a second to look at your keyboard...As you saw they are right next to one another. I always have to arrow back to the word and replace the semi-colon with the apostrophe. I wish it had auto-correct so it would know I wanted to type can't instead of can;t. On second thought my phone has auto-correct and it, to put it bluntly, sucks. I was sending a text the other day and I wrote "You damn skippy" because that is one of my favorite sayings. Well, it came out "You damn sloppy". So I sent it again making sure I typed in skippy an even explaining that auto-correct changed the word. Auto-correct strikes again. For the second time it changed the word to sloppy. I then added it to my dictionary. I won't be second guessed by my freakin phone. (By the way, when I typed in the word won't just now, I typed in a semi-colon instead of the apostrophe. D'OH!)

Anywho...believe it or not, after that rambling, my head was clear. Actually, it was clear enough to remember that hilarious anecdote so I guess it worked.

I thought about Kelly and Madison and Ian and the little one...what's her name...think Presidents...oh yea Reagan. (Man, I'm a goof)

I thought about how lucky I am. I thought about how if I had the chance to do anything over again I wouldn't change a thing.

And yes, I typed the wouldn't as wouldn;t.

Back again...

2011-08-03T07:28:00.002-05:00

Where should I start...

Madison presented herself for Baptism on Sunday. She made her profession of faith and is ready to become an "official" Christian.

She initiated the conversation without any prodding from us. She spoke with our pastor, Sam, and she came down the aisle last Sunday. For those of you not familiar with how the Baptists do things, at the end of the service they have a time where church members can come down the aisle to the pastor and pray or join the church or ask for Baptism. It's a big deal. Coming down that aisle all by yourself is a little scary. Or so I am told.

Needless to say, Kelly and I are very proud. She is an 8 year old wise beyond her years. We know, and Sam agrees, that she understands what she is doing and what it means to be a Christian.

When we talked about it with Ian and Reagan, Reagan asked "When can we get appetized?" Ian when told how a Baptism works, in the Baptist church they are fully submerged, looked a little concerned:

What's the matter son?
They go totally underwater?
Yep.
Can I wear my goggles because I can't go under water without my goggles?

Reagan wasn't too keen on getting appetized after that either. She can't go underwater so she will have none of it.

As a Catholic, this is all new to me. The sacrament that best correlates to the Baptist Baptism is Confirmation. Catholics "seal the covenant" or confirm their infant Baptism at Confirmation. Baptists confirm their belief in Christ through Baptism. I don't want to wax poetic on the dogma but that is my belief in a nutshell.

On the weight front, I don't know how much I weigh. I do know I am still buying smaller pants. 10 sizes so far. I have about 6 sizes to go. If I could make it 8, that would be gravy.

I am still training for a 5K in November. I was going to do the Turkey Trot but it is a Susan G Komen foundation sponsored event and they give to Planned Parenthood. That is something I will not do. So the 5K is still a go; I just need to find a new one to run. There's got to be a million of them.

I just got through reading this post. I don't want to upset anybody. Rest assured any word choice was not pre-conceived to elicit emotional distress. I just wrote what I felt. So please don't read into this. Now I am projecting.

I will shut up now.

Sixty seven years ago today...

2011-06-06T14:50:00.004-05:00

What makes free men jump out of landing craft in rough seas jump out to face this?

Sixty-seven years ago, free men of America, Great Britain, Canada, and Poland-in-exile stormed the shores of Normandy into the teeth of Adolf Hitler’s Fortress Europe. The losses at Omaha Beach especially were astounding; over 4400 Allied servicemen died in the assault, and 7500 more were wounded or went missing. Americans made up almost two-thirds of the overall casualties (over 6600). The German casualty figures were never known, but estimates range from 4000 to 9000. But that was just the first day of the Battle of Normandy. By the time Normandy was secured, over 425,000 casualties had been inflicted on both sides, 209,000 by Allied forces. Another 200,000 troops were captured by the allies. The French paid a price, too; over 15,000 civilians were killed in the Battle of Normandy.

Think of that picture above and the courage it took to take that first step. Many of the men who saw this vista died without ever getting past the shore. What made them take that step? Certainly discipline strengthened them, but these men knew that they faced one of the most evil regimes the world had ever known — and that the Nazis wouldn’t stop with Europe. Evil could not be contained, nor appeased; it had to be fought and destroyed, and that it would take a tremendous sacrifice to end it. They went forth to battle evil, and even if they as individuals fell, these men knew that liberty and justice would defeat evil, and that their sacrifice would make that victory possible.

Not for nothing do we call this our “Greatest Generation.” Most of them are gone now, but their valor and dedication live on to challenge, inspire, rebuke, and encourage us. We should not less this date pass without some remembrance as long as free people cherish their liberty.

FInally weighed myself the other day...

2011-05-16T21:41:00.002-05:00

265!

That's 2 lbs shy of 70. It felt good. So I had a bowl of Capn Crunch. Mutley moment there.

I have to get back on the treadmill. It has been almost two weeks since I have been on that thing. I feel so good when I am done walking/running. I need to keep that mindset throughout the week.

The best thing right now is being able to walk into a store and by some clothes. And it isn't a tall and fat store. I bought two golf shirts and two pair of nike shorts. No way on God's green earth I could have fit into those things 3 months ago. It is very nice to be able to do that. People who don't battle wieght problems just don't understand the feeling of being able to do that. But we each have our triumphs.

T-ball season is almost over. Ian is much more aggressive on the field. Still some issues but he is 5 and is doing great. He said he loves tball. We will be practicing every week until next season. He can't wait.

I just realized Madison will be in 3rd grade next year. Only 2 weeks of school left and she's a 3rd grader. Man-oh-man! Time flies.

She is still reading...and reading...and reading. We are so proud of her. She is wise and mature beyond her years. I told you about the people game: one clue she gave was this man invented paper money and taught himself to swim at the age of 6. It was Benjamin Franklin. She continues to astound me in the things she knows. All because she read it somewhere. I hope she keeps it up. She wants to be a librarian so that's a good sign.

Reagan is the tag along. No matter what Ian and Madison do she wants to do it too. No fear. Tattletale. Just like her old man.

She is the cutest thing I have ever seen.

As a side note, I like TV shows about Bigfoot. They scare the crap out of me but I watch them nonetheless. When I was a boy we went to Oregon to see my Aunt and Uncle. They had a house in the forest. Their bathroom did not have curtains on it so you looked right out into the forest. Unless it was dark then you couldn't see anything. I did not go to the bathroom from sunset to sunrise the whole time we were there.

Come to think of it, that may be why in my heyday I could sit at a bar and drink for hours on end and never go to the bathroom. People thought there was something wrong with me. Nope. Just had a bigfoot bladder.

Moving right along...

2011-05-05T15:22:00.002-05:00

like a skinny guy in his natural habitat...a Studebaker. (That's a muppet movie refernce by the way)

Still losing as far as I know. I haven't weighed myself but my belts are not holding up my pants anymore. No more holes. Time for a new belt.

I have kind of plateaued however. They said that would happen when I started eating real food. I am still not eating much. It's just that the body gets used to pretty much nothing. A little food slows the metabolism.

I do have a plethora of energy. Jefe, what is a plethora? (Three Amigos movie reference there, sorry. I actually didn't use the word correctly in this context but I will stop at nothing to reference a movie. Even break grammar rules. And for me that's huge.) The surgery is paying off nicely. And thanks to a tax refund I will be paying off the surgery quickly too.

I am starting a new job on Monday with a company here in Dallas. They do what I do on a grander scale. They have more resources so I can learn more. It's a steady paycheck and, best of all, insurance.

I wasn't looking. They called me. When they found out they were actually one of my clients, it clinched the deal. The travel was excessive so I said thanks but no thanks. They called back later that day and made me an offer I couldn't refuse. Little bit of travel. Mo' money. You can't go wrong with that. I'm looking forward to it.

The kids are still learning, growing, thriving, fighting. As they get older it is ramping up. More frequently. More intensity. I'm about to erect an octagonal ring in the living room and let them go at it.

Kelly had her Children's Chorus of Greater Dallas concert on Sunday at the Myerson. It was phenomenal. Her choir sang a song by Puccini that was the highlight of the evening. She is a talented woman and I am very blessed to be her husband.

SHort and sweet today.

It's been a while...

2011-04-13T10:14:00.003-05:00

but I have so much energy now I don't want to spend it in front of a computer screen anymore. I still work from behind here and that makes it much harder to write this blog.

Things have been progressing nicely. I am down 8 pant sizes officially. Bought a new pair of jeans; which by the way I caught myself having to pull up this morning....aside...I have found the key to my childrens humor. I can stand in the middle of the room and move my belly back and forth, ala Fozzie Bear in the wokka-wokka mode, and my pants will fall to my ankles.

They laugh so hard they cry. All to the echoes of "Do it again! Do it again!".

I am comedy.

Kelly and I had a date night the other night. We left early about 4:00. Went to Sfuzzi'z in Uptown and sat on the porch. Had some bread with olive oil and pepper. Ordered a fabulous smoked salmon bruschetta and a pepperoni/organic veggie pizza. All wonderfully delicious. Brought a lot of food home.

We people watched. Talk about a boob and cocaine crowd. Holy Moly! There was more plastic on that patio than in our kids toy bin. You know the kind of people who look like they feel they are owed something.

It was a great time. Albeit slow. We looked at our watches after much merriment and revelry and it was 6:15...ok...what now? We drove around the Highland Park area and looked at the old homes with the huge trees and thought, wow...this is what our neighborhood looks like. Lucky us.

We than found a Humperdinks where the leather couches were free. I finished watching the Rangers beat the Orioles while Kelly fell asleep on my shoulder. What party animals! We were home by 8:30.

T-ball is going well. Ian got the game ball last night. He hit the ball well; out of the infield in fact. He made the last out by fielding the ball at 3rd base and stepping on 3rd to force out the runner. I think I may have been more proud of him for the fielding than the first hit. He was having an issue with fielding the ball and through some practice and hard work he overcame it.

Barney Fife moment.

The pool is all clean and ready to go for summer. I had to get in last Saturday to try to fix the pool sweep. My boys still haven't come down. TMI I know but man that water was cold.

The kids will be getting in this weekend. Sans daddy who is still recovering. They are looking forward to it.

As always the Pfaffenberger family is blessed happy and healthy.

Thank you, Obama!

I am officially...

2011-04-02T07:21:00.003-05:00

no longer considered diabetic.

Went to my Dr and he took me off all diabetes meds. I still take 1 for the arrhythmia and 1 for blood pressure. I was taking 6 so I'm pretty happy. I am not taking the blood pressure medicine for blood pressure strangely enough. My BP was 116/60. The years of diabetes took a toll on the kidneys so the BP medicine is working to help the kidneys.

I jogged/walked 1.75 miles yesterday in 32 minutes. Slowly but surely, I am winning this battle.

I had a piece of pizza last night for the first time in about 3 months. As expected, it was awesome! I did not get through half of it before I started to feel full. That's the trick. Stop eating when you start to fell full. Before, I took that as a sign to eat faster because I didn't have much time. Now, I take it for what it actually means. Your body doesn't need any more. For a skinny person, those aren't decisions they consciously think about. For a large person, it is a matter of life or death.

I was doing something outside in the dirt and I went to wipe something off my hand and when I did my wedding ring went flying into the jasmine. Needle in a haystack my keester, ever try to find a wedding ring in the jasmine. Not an easy task. Nonetheless, I found it. All that to say, it may be time for some tape around the ole wedding ring less I lose it.

It may be time to start kicking Steve's butt in racquetball again...I've decided...yes, it's time.

2.8.8.

2011-03-29T16:41:00.003-05:00

That's 288 lbs!

Those of you reading this who think man that is still a lot of weight, are right but it ain't nothing compared to 333 where I started. Go find a 50 lb weight and lift it, or a bag of sugar times 50.

It is amazing to think about.

They cleared me to do whatever I want. I am not restricted on foods or exercise. I can eat what I want. Strange, but I don't want what I wanted before. Although the hamburger is still on the list.

Just wanted to let you know about the weight loss. Thanks for reading.

I may have to change my song soon.

Week 6 of post surgery...

2011-03-28T12:19:00.002-05:00

and all is very well.

I seem to be pulling the belt tighter every day. I am down to my last notch. I may have to pull out the scissors to make more because I'm not ready to buy new clothes just yet. I like pulling on the britches and having tons of room. This weekend I was out cleaning the pool. I was skimming the leaves and my shorts dropped around my ankles. Good thing we have a high fence...and I was wearing clean skivies. I thought that was pretty cool.

Tomorrow I have a Drs appointment. I will get weighed. Haven't been weighed in over a month. I hope it's where I want to be. If not, I need to focus on the shorts around my ankles. I like not knowing what I weigh. I like focusing on pant size and peoples feedback. I'm starting to get a lot of

"Have you lost weight?"
You damn skippy!
"How'd you do it?"
I had 80% of my stomach removed!

That always gets an "Oh!"

Ian had his first game on Saturday. I swelled up when he hit his first ball and ran to 1st. What a great moment. I think I will be watching my grandkids play and flash back to that moment as if it was yesterday.

Madison continues to amaze me. She is so smart. We play a game called The Person Game. Someone gives a clue of a person or character and the others try to guess who it is. I remember playing with her when she was younger and she would give clues for Cinderella and Belle. Now she gives clues for Abraham Lincoln, Benjamin Franklin and Eleanor Roosevelt. Two of the clues, I did not know. I asked her where she learned that and she said she read it in a book.

She reads 300 page books in an afternoon. Chapter books. Not kid books.

Reagan...what can I say about Reagan? Independent. Headstrong. Fiesty. Pretty much just like her mother. Her vocabulary is expanding every day. She loves to mimic her older brother. She loves to draw. She has the best pitch of all 3 kids. She really can carry a tune. She stays on key, has rhythm, the whole nine yards.

Yep just like mommy.

I thank God everyday for my good fortune. A beautiful, talented and caring wife. My children who are the reason I was put on this earth. My health.

I am blessed.

Almost 6 weeks...

2011-03-12T08:19:00.002-06:00

without a solid bite of food. The closest thing I have had to food is a sugar free popsicle.

I can't believe I made it.

Starting Monday, I can have oatmeal, eggs, shaved deli meat, low fat cheese, ground lean beef etc. It's all down hill form here my friends.

I am walking a mile a day. Taking 21 minutes. Not bad for me. By the time the 5k Turkey Trot rolls around in November, I will be ready. My goal is to be able to run the 5k in about 36 minutes. If I can go faster, more power to me.

I don't know how much weight I have lost. I don't have a scale. I do know none of my pants fit me anymore and my t-shirt world has opened up considerably. Pants and shirts I haven't worn in years are coming out of the closet. One of my favorite shirts of all time, a Harlequins rugby shirt, came out of the closet last week. I hadn't been able to wear that shirt for 9 years. It felt really good.

I have to say I am at the point where everything I've gone through and the money I spent is absolutely worth it. My sugar levels have been below 100 since the surgery; from 89 to 97. My blood pressure has been 130 over 70. I am taking 2 pills instead of 6. And the 2 may go by the wayside too.

Feeling very good and starting to feel better about myself. Which is the main thing. Going through life not feeling good about yourself is a hard thing to live with. So much so that you start to take it out on other people.

I had a Barney Fife moment. Well I've had more than one but this is kind of a milestone. Ian had his first baseball practice this week. Now his first practice was not so good. He thought it was going to be him and I and his cousins going to practice. Well when he got there 14 kids were running around. It overwhelmed him a little, well alot, and he did not practice. He just sat on the sidelines. I was disappointed but I can't convey that to him.

We talked about it and he said he would play next time now that he knew what th deal was. And play he did; catching the ball, throwing, hitting, he did it all. He did extremely well for his first baseball practice ever. Insert BF face here.

At the end of the practice, the boys put their hands together and yell "Dodgers!" Well, he didn't like that too much. Way too loud. He started to cry. He then said he didn't want to play tball anymore. I told him he didn't have to do the cheer at the end of practice. He could do it from afar and he perked up after that. We are going to the field today to field some grounders and throw and bat a little.

Baby steps, Ian. Just like your old man.

Saw the Dr yesterday...

2011-03-02T13:27:00.002-06:00

well actually his PA, regardless I am on the mend.

Staples were taken out. Ian was fascinated. He wasn't there of course but he realy liked looking at my staples. When I came home and they weren't there. He really thought that was cool.

I have lost a total of 30 lbs in about 4 weeks. Not too shabby.

Skin healing nicely. Stomach healing nicely. Barium slid through the banana like a luger. Next appointment is at the end of the month and I intend to be well into the 280s by then.

I met a fellow gastric sleever in the Drs office. Nice guy. Had the surgery the same day as I. Same Dr. Same hospital. Same day to get his stitches removed. We are pretty much on the same path. So you can imagine my surprise when he informed me he had already eaten a few little vegetables and had a small bite or two of brisket. I couldn't believe my ears.

The reason they tell you not to eat solid food is because regardless of how well you chew it, small particles could end up getting caught in the staple lining of the stomach and cause infection. If having a stomach lining infection is something I can avoid, I think I just as soon will.

I don't think that guy has read any literature. Something I can't be accused of. I know the dos and donts, ins and outs, rights and wrongs of this procedure backward and forward and I am following them to the letter. Call it a return on investment. Don't get me wrong I look forward to the day when I can have a piece of cheese or maybe a small helping of hamburger, sans bun of course, but I am not about to jeopardize what I've worked for to this point for that. Is eating a piece of brisket right now more important than walking my daughters down the aisle?

The answer is a resounding NO!

Home Again. Home Again...

2011-02-24T21:42:00.002-06:00

as my mom would say.

I arrived at the hospital early Monday morning at 7:00. Bright eyed and bushy tailed. Ready, willing and able...Then proceeded to wait 3 hours until they finally called me back. Apparently some guy before me had a lot of scar tissue and he was a tough surgery. Knocked everythng back about 2 hours.

The first thing they did was weigh me. I was looking forward to that because I know where I started but had no clue how much I had lost on the liquid diet. They weighed me in kilograms. D'OH! I did the 2.2 conversion in my head but just gave me a rough estimate. Turns out I lost 23 lbs in those 2 1/2 weeks on the liquid. WOOHOO!

The guy came in to give me the IV. He asked where I have had my other IVs and I told him my hands. Blood taken, IVs all in my hands. He then proceeded to needle me in the forearm and poke around for what seemed 5 minutes. After not being able to find the vein, he put one in my hand. I asked him why he bothered to ask me where my IVs go when it was clear he had an agenda. He was very apologetic and we left on good terms.

Is it prejudice or racism when I say I prefer my Drs Asian-American? Dr Kim who performed my surgery as well as Nate Newtons by the way is Asian. He did a bang up job. I was his 8th surgery that day. In and out in 45 minutes. Took 75% of my stomach with him.

The day of surgery you can't drink anything. Nothing. Nada. Zip. Zilch. The first thing you get to drink is barium on day 2. 24 hours after surgery. Ever had barium? Nasty, Nasty stuff. And when I say nasty, think of me saying it as a home girl eyes wide open shifting my head back and forth across my shoulders.

Started to drink water and protein drinks on Tuesday. Felt a little nauseated after that I must say. Gradually though, my ounce filled cups have been going down easier and faster. I am right on track so all is well.

The treadmill is here. I have been on a few times. I am ready to burn out the motor. Baby steps though. Baby steps.

Liquids until Monday then eggs and cream soups. I can't wait.

I'll keep you posted.

Tomorrow is the big day...

2011-02-20T20:24:00.002-06:00

under the knife.

I am ready. Not nervous. Ready to get on with this chapter of my life.

If you're thinking of me tomorrow at 9:00, I could use a prayer. (The surgery was moved up 1/2 hour)

Don't know when I will get back to the blog but I will make it ASAP.

Surgery is scheduled...

2011-02-18T16:25:00.002-06:00

Monday at 9:30 at Forest Park Medical Center on 75 and Forest.

Counting the days. Never thought I would be so excited to eat broth. You see after the surgery I am still on a liquid diet but I can have broth. Sweet broth. Sweet wonderful broth.

I am still not hungry. I get pangs of wanting to chew periodically but I have a sugar free popsicle and all is well. Knowing I will eventually get back to normal is the thought that keeps me going. I say normal but I mean fractions of what I used to eat. There are some things I can never eat again but that's OK. Again, I've had a good run.

I thought of a way to prove Obama is a citizen. Someone steal his wallet. I lost my wallet and trying to get a replacement drivers license is not an easy task.

While sitting at the DPS as the number 025 was called while I held 048 in a room full of sadsacks, one thought warmed my heart. The people responsible for this room will soon be responsible for our entire health care system.

Happy days!

If I were the Governor of Wisconsin, I would tell the protesting teachers, who are doing it illegally by the way, they have 3 days to get back to work. If they do not go back, fire them all ala Reagan and the Air Traffic controllers.

They'd have those jobs filled in a week.

T minus one week and counting...

2011-02-13T12:03:00.002-06:00

My surgery is a week from tomorrow. I can't wait.

I am flying through this thing now. I am not hungry. Ice and gum are enough to get me through my chewing need. It's all down hill from here.

As a part of the new exercise pledge, we walked the kids down to the park. While we were there, Ian was climbing a tree. He was straddling the branch between his legs when he broke into song loud and clear for all to hear;

Oh, Oh my teetee hurts.
Oh, Oh my teetee hurts oh yea!

At least he made up his own tune and was on key. That's my boy.

Signed Ian up for his first tee ball team. He will be playing with 3 cousins and a neighbor. It will be a blast. Mike, Steve and I are coaching. Reed, Mike's son, Patrick and Christian, Steve's sons and Ian are all playing. We are the Dodgers. We will be going out today to practice a bit. I hope he has fun. I think he will.

I think perhaps Ian's foray into organized sports may be a catalyst for this surgery. I have always wanted to coach him. In my present state, it would be very difficult.

That is soon to change.

The dreaded before picture...

2011-02-09T11:46:00.002-06:00

...And he's large!

Thought I should throw one up here so I have something to look back on.

Not sure what prompted this new mindset. I have been skating along status quo for quite a while. Perhaps it was the traveling I've been doing to Chicago. There are a lot of mirrors in hotel rooms. A lot. Brush your teeth; mirror. Go to the bathroom; mirror. Take a shower; EEEEEEK! mirror.

Geez Louise, I'm sorry, Kelly.

I am starting to feel for the first time that this is very doable. I am looking forward to solid food of course but it is not driving my thoughts. I am not having the all consuming urge to drive into Quick Trip and get a candy bar. As a matter of fact I did pull into Quick Trip the other day and came out with skim milk for my protein shakes and a bottled water. Yea me!

One step at a time. One day at a time.

43 years. I had a good run.

Day by Day...

2011-02-08T14:56:00.002-06:00

Day by Day...Oh Dear Lord...3 things I pray

To have a plate of baked ziti
To have a diet coke and CC
To have a slice of pi...zza

Day by Day

It actually is getting easier. I have not had half as many wanting to quit moments and the hunger pains have pretty much subsided. Every day is one step closer to healthy-ville. Population: me.

I bought a treadmill. Not one of the Sears specials either. A heavy duty one for a heavy duty dude. I am looking forward to wearing it out.

It has 20 pre-programmed routines on it. You can hook your mp3 player up to it. It inclines up to 15 degrees. And a bunch of stuff that I will probably never use. But it's there if I need it.

My goal is to run a 5K. I don't know how long it will take me to get to a point where I can actually run one but as I get closer I'll let you know. I have been promised by my good friend Jim he will run with me. I am excited about this challenge. Maybe I can get Kelly to go with me? Honey?

Not that she needs to exercise because she is pretty much a babe but for moral support. I can use all of that I can get.

Surgery is less than 2 weeks away. Have been on the liquid for a week. Pants feel a little looser already. Don't know if that's just mental but regardless, I am feeling better about myself. Which is huge.

I don't have a lot of self-confidence when it comes to my looks. When I am a lean mean fighting machine I hope I gain some.

Thanks for reading.

It actually is getting easier...

2011-02-05T09:31:00.002-06:00

thank the Good Lord Almighty.

It's amazing how seriously you entertain the thought of jeopardizing your longevity by eating a slice of pizza or a chicken wing. I keep telling myself one day I can have a bite of pizza or a chicken wing or even a cookie. I'll have that taste again. I just won't have half a pizza or 15 wings or 6 cookies.

I went to my Bariatric University class yesterday. That is simply the introduction class to what I will be going through. For those of you that don't know I will be having the gastric sleeve surgery. There are 3 types of weight loss surgery: 1. Gastric bypass - where they cut out most of the stomach and re-plumb you 2. Lap Band - where they tie a belt around your stomach and tighten it periodically and 3. Gastric sleeve - they make your stomach into the size of a banana cutting away about 75% of it. There is no re-plumbing and the vitamin absorption rate is normal.

If the classes objective was to scare the crap out of you, mission accomplished. There are a lot of rules and new habits to put in place. Most of it mental. But if that doesn't translate to the physical, you pretty much are relegated to a quivering vomiting mass of sugar-feee food stuffs.

I get the point.

This is a big step. No turning back. Non-reversible. All that doesn't matter to me anymore; extending my stay on this sacred wet-green one that we live on, is.

I went sledding with the kids yesterday on the one hill in Farmers Branch. Other dads were sliding down the hill with the kids. Not me. Too big. Mark my words; my kids will never have a day where their dad won't be able to sled with them down the hill.

Never.

You can't make this stuff up...

2011-02-03T12:19:00.001-06:00

Evil, Evil Ronald!

One day down...

2011-02-03T10:16:00.004-06:00

the rest of my life to go.

For the most part, I am doing pretty well. I have had a few moments of wanting to turn back but I have muddled through. I realize it's only day 2 but I presume things will get easier as I go along.

Yesterday morning I walked into the kitchen and picked up a piece of sausage Kelly had made for the kids and just about took a bite. Old habits die hard I guess. Luckily, I remembered my lifestyle change and did not cheat before I even started.

Have you realized how many food commercials there are on TV? Holy moley, from apples to ziti I must have seen them all. I was stalwart however and came out on top. Hungry; but on top.

How is it I haven't had solid food in over 36 hours and yet I am still camped out in the hopper? TMI I know but I want to give you every aspect of what I am going through.

I go to my orientation class tomorrow. I guess they'll tell me what to expect and all that. I expect to be thin, not take any pills and not dread dropping things on the floor for fear of having to bend over to pick it up.

Being fat sucks. I guess I could blame it on McDonalds or chocolate producers or cattle ranchers. But I figure they didn't force me to eat the food. I did this to myself. I'll get myself out of it.

Then I'll sue their asses off.

Big changes...

2011-02-01T21:43:00.002-06:00

tomorrow starts a new chapter in my life. I am going to call it the "Little John" era.

Tomorrow I start on my all liquid diet in preparation for my gastric sleeve surgery. I am having 3/4 of my stomach made inoperable.

I have pondered this decision for quite some time. It all boils down to 4 things; Kelly, Madison, Ian and Reagan. If I were to keep my current eating habits up, I probably would not be around too much longer.

I don't want that.

So tomorrow I start my journey to health. It is not going to be easy. I know that. But I have mentally prepared myself for that and I am very excited about the new path.

I will keep you posted on the progress.

I've had a pretty good run. It's time to suck it up and pay the piper.

My favorite Christmas movie,...

2010-12-24T05:41:00.002-06:00

for those of you that don't know, is It's a Wonderful Life.

It's the story of George Bailey, his life and how one man can effect so many other lives. Whether he knows it or not.

The story begins in Bedford Falls. All through the town we can hear people praying for a George. The cop, the taxi driver, women, children; everybody who is somebody. The sound travels all the way to heaven where God and St Peter are discussing the influx of prayers. They realize it is Georges crucial night and they send for Clarence.

Clarence is an angel second class who hasn't got his wings and whose turn it is to help a human. George is that human and Peter is non too happy about it. God tolerates Peter's insubordination and Peter and Clarence begin studying Georges life. Clarence can't see the past so Peter has to help him. I must say Peter in this movie is much along the lines of Santa in Rudolph. He's kind of a jerk.

Clarence sees a boy riding down a snow covered hill on a shovel. It's George. He's there with his buddies, Sam, Marty and his little brother Harry. Who is not scared by the way. When Harry shovels down he goes too far on the ice and falls in. George jumps in and saves him but loses his hearing in his left ear because of an infection from the cold.

Next we meet Mr Potter. Mistaken by Clarence as a king, we are told by Peter Mr Potter is the richest, meanest man in Bedford Falls.

George is whistling while he enters Mr Gowers drug store where he works. Visibly disturbed, Mr Gower yells at George for being late and not being a canary. Here we meet the two ladies vying for Georges affection now and in the future, Violet, who likes all the boys, and Mary Hatch. (Sigh.)

George is sent on a home delivery by Gower. Knowing something is wrong, Gower's son has passed away of influenza, George goes and talks to his father after eyeing a Sweet Caporal add about asking father...he knows. Cigars? Is there anything they can't do?

We meet Uncle Billy and George's dad at the office. He is having a tussle with Potter, who is every bit as cantankerous as Peter said.

George goes back to the drug store without delivering the pills and Gower, visibly drunk, goes ballistic. He slaps George and makes his ear bleed and calls him a lazy loafer. George explains he knows Gower is unhappy because of the telegram about his son and he put poison in the pills. Gower tastes the pills, realizes what he has done and gives George a big hug and George says he won't tell anyone.

The next scene George is about 22 I'm guessing. Out of high school and waiting to go to college. He had to work at the Bailey Building & Loan to get enough money to go to school. He is buying a large suitcase so when he travels the world he has a place to put the stickers. He goes home via Ernie the taxi driver and Bert the Cop, yes the Sesame Street characters were named after these two characters, and we meet his mom, Harry his brother and Annie their maid. He tells his pop he is a great guy then goes off to Harry's graduation party where Harry looks like the BMOC because he gets to introduce the big Charleston contest.

Then it happens. We see Mary all grown up. Hubba. Hubba. George steals her form Othello, Alfalfa from the Lil Rascals, and proceeds to fall in the pool built under the floor which saved the school another building when Othello opened the floor because he was jealous.

We are introduced to grownup Sam and Marty as well. Side notes, Marty does a Hee Haw thing and Marty is Mary's brother.

George and Mary are walking home when George finds out his father had a stroke. He rushes home and you can see the genuine look of concern on Mary's face. She loves that boy. Which she told us back in Gowers drug store. She whispered it in his bad ear.

George ends up staying in Bedford Falls to run the Building and Loan and sends Harry to school on his dough. Four years pass and George is waiting for Harry as he comes home from school. When Harry gets back, George is ready to go exploring. It's what he has talked about since he was a boy. Well, Harry got married and George is stuck again. Who gets married and doesn't tell anyone?

That night George expresses his love for Mary and the two are wed. He saves the Building & Loan from the evil clutches of Mr Potter after the bank collapsed by using his own honeymoon money to appease his investors. He proceeds home to Sycamore Street where Mary has prepared their future home. The home is significant in that earlier after the graduation dance as George and Mary walked home, they threw rocks at the house and made wishes. George told his wish about exploring but Mary kept silent. Until now. She wished on that day years ago that she and George would be married and live in that house.

Sly old Mary. Makes us love her all the more.

They raise a family and absent minded Uncle Billy loses $8000. (And on the same day as Harrys homecoming parade. See, he won the Congressional Medal of Honor for saving the lives of every man on a transport in WWII.) George knows he'll be blamed. Potter calls the cops on George for malfeasance. George finds out he is worth more dead than alive. He gets punched in the mouth by an angry teachers husband. George balled out the teacher for sending Zuzu his daughter home with an open coat which caused her to get a cold.

George crashes his car into a tree and wanders over to the bridge. You can see in his eyes he ain't right and he is about to jump. He goes to climb up the railing when Clarence out of nowhere jumps in first. George dives in and saves him. Woohoo!

Clarence gives George a great gift. A chance to see what the world would be like without him. He goes to Martinis. The bar his friend owns but now it is Nicks and he is not so nice. Gower comes in and looks like a bum. He spent 30 years n jail for poisoning a kid. (Remember)

His car is gone, Ernie doesn't know him, his house is old again and Bert doesn't know him. Worse yet, his mother doesn't know him. He goes to the cemetery where...Harry is buried. Died in the ice. (Remember) All the troops died on the transport because George didn't save Harry.

The deepest cut of all is that Mary is an old maid and doesn't recognize George.

At his wits end, he heads back to the bridge after running from Bert the cop. While saying he wants to live again, it begins to snow. Which it was doing the last time he was on the bridge but never did during his "dead time". Bert calls him George, his lip starts bleeding again and...Zuzus petals, Zuzus petals, There they are!

He rushes home to find his children, reporters and cops. He doesn't care. He's alive.

One by one the townspeople come to bail George out. They give without question straight from the heart. Exactly as George did. All because of Mary spreading the word.

The movie ends with Clarence getting his wings and George saying, "Atta boy Clarence!"

If you haven't seen this movie; first, shame on you and second, see it. I left out a bunch of stuff and you probably even have a question or two. All will be answered on your journey through Bedford Falls.

Two days til the big guy gets here...

2010-12-22T10:59:00.002-06:00

This season has been filled with singing and shopping and watching movies and specials and baking.

What fun!

Ian had his first Christmas program. He sang with the rest of the kids his age, all 3 of them. Regardless, it was neat to see him up there singing for the first time. Does a Daddy proud.

Madison is an old pro. This is like her third or fourth. She did a great job reading and singing. Reagan is not quite old enough yet but that didn't stop her from going up on the stage when all the other kids did at the end to take a bow.

I heard Mel Torme last night for the first time this Christmas. He will put you in the mood. As I've said before, his rendition of The Christmas Song is my favorite. Even more so than Nat King Cole's. Both are excellent but I give the nod to Mel because after all he wrote the song.

I have Charlie Brown Christmas playing in my truck exclusively. I am watching nothing but Christmas themed shows. I wear nothing but red and green and a Santa hat. It's getting close to zero hour. No holding back now.

This is truly the greatest time of the year. I need to remember that as the festivities continue but especially as they wind down.

Pray that I keep my big yap shut, please.

Tradition...

2010-12-12T12:32:00.002-06:00

no big deal, right?

What's one tradition by the wayside? We don't want to offend anyone.

All is right with the world.

Tradition!...

2010-12-11T16:31:00.002-06:00

Tradition!

So says Tevia.

I come from a background of tradition. For starters, I am Catholic. I defy you to show me a more traditionalistic Christian sect. Baptism, the Eucharist, confession, holy matrimony, last rites; all traditions or in this case sacraments handed down from generation to generation.

Perhaps the greatest time of the year for tradition is Christmas. Whether it be how you decorate the house and tree or how you open the presents on Christmas morning or what you eat traditionally for Christmas, traditions abound.

Tradition!...Tradition!

What makes a tradition? What is it that defines a tradition? Is it the act of buying a baptism outfit? Is it planning a big extravagant wedding? Is it buying the first suit? Of course not. Whether that baby is donned in gold cloth or naked as the day they were born the act of pouring the water over his or her precious little head is what marks the tradition. Would Kelly and I still be as married if we showed up at the church in shorts and t-shirts and before God vowed to love one another until death do us part? We would.

It's not the amounts spent leading up to the event. It's the event.

One of my favorite traditions in our family is Kris Kringle. Because our family is so big, the adults draw names so we just have one adult to buy for. The kids still get their allotted presents as it should be. Again, because our family is so big we don't buy presents for one another on birthdays, except children, so this is the one time of the year we actually exchange gifts.

I am only human so I love to receive presents but it is also fun to give them too. I seemed to get my dad about 10 years in a row. I have given him a wall hanging of UCLA buildings, it looks cooler than it sounds. I gave my brother a cigar lighter. I gave my sister in law a Mickey Mouse sweatshirt. All in separate years of course.

Tradition is the tie that binds. Whether it be a church a civilization or a family.

Tradition! Tradition!

We must strive to keep our balance.

Tradition! Tradition!

We are all Fiddlers on the Roof!

A repost but I like this one...Top 10 minor characters in Christmas Movies...

2010-12-07T11:11:00.002-06:00

10. Santa Claus - Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer.

I hesitated to put him on this list. But I kept coming back to him. Why? He had to be the biggest jerk in any of the Christmas movies sans Mr. Potter. Telling a father he should be ashamed of himself because his son has a glowing red nose? Dissing the elves song. I mean, what's up with that? He is skinny and grumpy. Everything we came not to expect form Santa. I got to hand it to Rudolph's writers, they knew how to throw a wrinkle into a claymation show. By the way, I found this clip after I wrote this description. Classic.

9./8. Heat and Snow Meiser - The Year Without a Santa Claus

The Year Without a Santa Claus was not that great of a special but these tow guys stole the show. I sing these songs to this day. (along with the rest of my siblings)

7. BurgerMeister MeisterBurger - Santa Claus is Coming to Town

How many of you can recite the exact inflection in the Burgermeisters voice when you see the line, "A yoyo?". That's why he is on this list. A classic villain. He doesn't turn good in the end. He remains true to his nasty ways to the end. One of my favorite lines of his is "...and I am certainly not going." Great comedic timing by a claymation figure.

6. Randy - The Christmas Story

Randy played the full emotional gammet. Disgust: "Meatloaf, beatloaf, double meatloaf. I hate meatloaf." Despair: "I can't put my arms down!" Empathy: "Daddy's gonna kill Ralphie!" He had it all. Randy and Ralphie had the textbook brother relationship. They fought, like when Randy tried to sneak in front of Ralph when they were getting dressed and all Randy got for his troubles was a swift kick in the tukus. But Randy was there for Ralph when he needed him. He was the one who picked up Ralphs glasses after the Scott Farkus affair. In this original movie trailer, check out Randy's face when he throws the socks. That innate comedic timing cannot be taught, my friends.

5. Winter Warlock - Santa Claus is Coming to Town.

Here is one villain who changed his stripes. "I am not such a loser after all!" This guy was a big blowhard meanie on the surface, but underneath he was an insecure little child just wanting to be accepted. Besides when he says,"...a chance to be reborn" it still cracks me up.

4. Snoopy - A Charlie Brown Christmas

He can play all the barnyard animals. Even a penguin. What more do you want? When he kisses Lucy and she says she needs some disifectant and iodine and he goes, "Bleah"; Katy and I love that. Madison does now too. I love how he laughs at Charlie Brown or when he boos him when he is announced as the director, "Man's best friend!". Or when he's embarrased after dancing on Schroeders piano and he stops playing. He's got it all.

3. Yukon Cornelius - Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer.

"Nothin'." Need I say more. He was the ultimate friend and protector, "...douse your nose and run like crazy." He was wise in the ways of the wild and it served Hermie and Rudolph well. If they had not run into him, well let's just say the special would have been about 20 minutes long and the Abominable Snowman would have had one good meal. We know he liked Peanut Butter hamhocks and played the guitar. He knew the bumbles weaknesses. And his ultimate quest was for gold...then silver.

2. Clarence - It's a Wonderful Life.

I admit I have a special place in my heart for Clarence. He elped the greatest character in Christmas movie history realize what he had. He did it with class, grace and comedy. Clarence was a man among angels. He has the IQ of a rabbit but the faith of a child. Clarence did God's work right here on earth. Clarence even earned his wings.

1. Linus - A Charlie Brown Christmas.

A Christmas Story...

2010-12-01T09:28:00.009-06:00

One of the funnist movies ever produced. It is in my top 2 at least. The quotes from this movie are endless. Proof below.

The story is about Ralphie who wants a BB gun for Christmas and his trials and tribulations in going about getting one. Hilarity ensues.

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Old Man: They go all over.

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Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] My little brother had not eaten voluntarily in over three years.

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Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] Only one thing in the world could've dragged me away from the soft glow of electric sex gleaming in the window.

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[Ralphie is visiting Santa at the department store, only he can't remember what he wanted]
Santa Claus: How about a nice football?
Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] Football? Football? What's a football? With unconscious will my voice squeaked out 'football'.
Santa Claus: Okay, get him out of here.
Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] A football? Oh no, what was I doing? Wake up, Stupid! Wake up!
Ralphie: [Ralphie is shoved down the slide, but he stops himself and climbs back up] No! No! I want an Official Red Ryder Carbine-Action Two-Hundred-Shot Range Model Air Rifle!
Santa Claus: You'll shoot your eye out, kid.

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Ralphie as Adult: [narrating, after BB gun shot bounces off target and hits his face] Oh my god, I shot my eye out!

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Ralphie: [narrating, after stepping on his glasses] Pulverized!

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Ralphie: I don't think a football is a very good Christmas present. Man that's great.

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Randy: Hey a zeppelin. Hey that's mine.

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Boy in School: [Firemen come to pull Flick off pole] Holy cow, it's the fire department!
Ralphie: Oh no...
Boy in School: [policemen come] Wow, it's the cops!

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Ralphie: I want an official Red Ryder, carbine action, two-hundred shot range model air rifle!
Mrs. Parker: No, you'll shoot your eye out.

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Mr. Parker: Get the glue.
Mother: We're out of glue.
Mr. Parker: You used up all the glue on purpose!

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Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] I have since heard of people under extreme duress speaking in strange tongues. I became conscious that a steady torrent of obscenities and swearing of all kinds was pouring out of me as I screamed.

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Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] They looked at me as if I had lobsters crawling out of my ears.

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Ralphie: Oooh fuuudge!
Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] Only I didn't say "Fudge." I said THE word, the big one, the queen-mother of dirty words, the "F-dash-dash-dash" word!
Mr. Parker: [stunned] *What* did you say?
Ralphie: Uh, um...
Mr. Parker: That's... what I thought you said. Get in the car. Go on!
Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] It was all over - I was dead. What would it be? The guillotine? Hanging? The chair? The rack? The Chinese water torture? Hmmph. Mere child's play compared to what surely awaited me.

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Ralphie as Adult: [narrating about diving with his brother into the gifts under the Christmas tree] We plunged into the cornucopia quivering with desire and the ecstasy of unbridled avarice.

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Ralphie: [While scratching his eye under his glasses] Whoooo should I start with?

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Mr. Parker: It's a Major Award!
Swede: Shucks, I wouldn't know that. It looks like a lamp.
Mr. Parker: What is a lamp, you nincompoop? It's a Major Award. I won it!
Swede: Damn, hell, you say won it?
Mr. Parker: Yeah, mind power, Swede; mind power.

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[after cracking a secret code]
Ralphie: [Reading it] Be sure to drink your Ovaltine. Ovaltine? A crummy commercial? Son of a bitch!

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Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] Some men are Baptists, others Catholics; my father was an Oldsmobile man.
Mr. Parker: That son of a bitch would freeze up in the middle of summer on the equator!
Mother: Little pitchers!
Mr. Parker: Thanks... hold it!
[the furnace conks out]
Mr. Parker: It's a clinker! That blasted stupid furnace dadgummit!
[he walks down a few stairs and falls the rest of the way down]
Mr. Parker: Damn skates!
[coughing]
Mr. Parker: Oh, for cripes sake, open up the damper will ya? Who the hell turned it all the way down? AGAIN! Oh, blast it!
Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] In the heat of battle my father wove a tapestry of obscenities that as far as we know is still hanging in space over Lake Michigan.

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Ralphie: Heh, I was just kidding, even though Schwartz is getting one. I guess I'd just like some Tinker Toys.
Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] I couldn't believe my own ears. Tinker Toys? She'd never buy it.

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Mother: All right. Now, are you ready to tell me where you heard that word?
Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] Now, I had heard that word at least ten times a day from my old man. He worked in profanity the way other artists might work in oils or clay. It was his true medium; a master. But, I chickened out and said the first name that came to mind.
Ralphie: Schwartz!

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Head Elf: COME ON, KID!
[pulls Ralphie]
Head Elf: COME ON!
Santa Claus: HO! HO HO!
[spins Ralphie around]
Santa Claus: HOOOO... HOOO... HOO... And what's your name little boy?
Male Elf: Hey, kid! HURRY UP! THE STORE'S CLOSING!
Head Elf: Listen little boy, we have A LOT of people waiting here, so GET GOING!

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[Mr. Parker reads a side of the box with the prize that he won]
Mr. Parker: Fra-gee-lay. That must be Italian.
Mrs. Parker: Uh, I think that says FRAGILE, dear.
Mr. Parker: Oh, yeah.

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The Old Man: Sons of bitches! Bumpuses!

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Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] Over the years I got to be quite a connoisseur of soap. My personal preference was for Lux, but I found Palmolive had a nice, piquant after-dinner flavor - heady, but with just a touch of mellow smoothness. Life Buoy, on the other hand...
Ralphie: YECCHH!

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Miss Shields: Now I know that some of you put Flick up to this, but he has refused to say who. But those who did it know their blame, and I'm sure that the guilt you feel is far worse than any punishment you might receive. Now, don't you feel terrible? Don't you feel remorse for what you have done? Well, that's all I'm going to say about poor Flick.
Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] Adults loved to say things like that but kids knew better. We knew darn well it was always better not to get caught.

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[overdressed for winter]
Randy: I can't put my arms down!
Mother: Well... put your arms down when you get to school.

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Goggles: I like The Wizard of Oz. I like the Tin Man.

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Ralph: Don't bother me I'm...thinking.

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[Describing a "reaction" to an encounter with the bullies]
Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] Randy lay there like a slug! It was his only defense!

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Ralphie: Scut Farkus!
Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] Scut Farkus! What a rotten name! We were trapped. There he stood, between us and the alley. Scut Farkus staring out at us with his yellow eyes. He had yellow eyes! So, help me, God! Yellow eyes!

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[in a Chinese restaurant]
Waiter #1, Waiter #2, Waiter #3: [singing] Deck the harrs with boughs of horry, fa ra ra ra ra, ra ra ra ra.
Chop Suey Palace Owner: No, no, not 'ra ra ra ra', 'la la la la'! Try again.
Waiter #1, Waiter #2, Waiter #3: Deck the harrs with boughs of horry, fa ra ra ra ra, ra ra ra ra.
Chop Suey Palace Owner: No, no! Sing something else.
Waiter #1, Waiter #2, Waiter #3: Jingre bers, jingre bers, jingre arr the way. Oh what fun it is to ride in a one-horse open sreigh!

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Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] Schwartz created a slight breach of etiquette by skipping the triple dare and going right for the throat!

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Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] My father could replace fuses faster than a jack rabbit on a date.

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[marveling at a Christmas gift he just opened]
Mr. Parker: A can of Simonize!

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Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] My kid brother looked like a tick about to pop!

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Randy: Daddy's gonna kill Ralphie!

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Randy: Meatloaf, smeatloaf, double-beatloaf. I hate meatloaf.

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Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] The old man stood there, quivering with fury, stammering as he tried to come up with a real crusher. All he got out was...
The Old Man: Naddafinga!

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Goggles: I like Santa.
Ralphie: Yeah.
Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] Let's face it, most of us are scoffers. But moments before zero hour, it did not pay to take chances.

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Ralphie: Mom, this is just the same dumb old parade as last year.
Mother: Ralphie, will you please calm down?
Ralphie: Mom!
Mother: Hush!
Mr. Parker: SHUT UP, Ralphie!

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Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] Never had the words flowed from my penny pencil with such feverish fluidity.

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Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] Strange. Even something as momentous as the Scut Farkus affair, which it came to be known, was pushed out of my mind as I struggled to come up with a way out of the impenetrable BB gun web, in which my mother had me trapped.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Santa Claus: Oh, I hate the smell of tapioca.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Mom: [Playing Santa] And this is for daddy...
[Picks up a gift-wrapped bowling ball and drops it in The Old Man's Lap]
Mom: Here, from me to you.
The Old Man: [high-pitched] Thanks a lot!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Miss Shields: Where's Flick? Has anyone seen Flick?
Ralphie as an Adult: [narrating as Ralphie feigns ignorance] Flick? Flick who?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Mr. Parker: [Reading Telegram and doing a little jig] Tonight! Tonight! It's coming Tonight! Tonight! Tonight! Tonight! Hot Damn, Tonight!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] My father worked in profanity the way other artists might work in oils or clay. It was his true medium, a master.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Randy: Aw, gee.

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Mr. Parker: Dadgummit! Blow out!
[on the highway, the car has gotten a flat tire]
Mr. Parker: Ah ha!
[excitedly gets out of the car]
Mother: Not again.
Mr. Parker: Four minutes. Time me.
Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] Actually the Old Man loved it. He had always pictured himself in the pits of the Indianapolis Speedway in the 500. My old man's spare tires were actually only tires in the academic sense. They were round, they had once been made of rubber.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ralphie as Adult: [narrating, after Mother breaks the Old Man's Major Award, and he is unsuccessful at repairing it] With as much dignity as he could muster, the Old Man gathered up the sad remains of his shattered major award. Later that night, alone in the backyard, he buried it next to the garage. Now I could never be sure, but I thought that I heard the sound of "Taps" being played, gently.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Mr. Parker: [after Mother "accidentally" breaks the Old Man's leg lamp] Don't you touch that! You were always jealous of this lamp.
Mother: Jealous of a plastic...
Mr. Parker: Jealous! Jealous because I WON.
Mother: That's ridiculous. Jealous. Jealous of WHAT? That is... the ugliest lamp I have ever seen in my entire LIFE!
Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] Now it was out.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Mother: This isn't one of those trees where all the needles falls off, is it?
Tree Man: No, that's them balsams.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Mr. Parker: [to Mother] You know, Zudock just bought one of those brand new green, plastic trees.
Tree Man: Oh no!
Mr. Parker: Darn thing looked like it was made of green pipe cleaners. Hee hee hee hee.
Mother: It's a very nice tree.
Tree Man: [quickly] I'll thrown in some rope and tie it to your car for you.
Mr. Parker: You got a deal.
Tree Man: Deal.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] The heavenly aroma still hung in the house. But it was gone, all gone! No turkey! No turkey sandwiches! No turkey salad! No turkey gravy! Turkey Hash! Turkey a la King! Or gallons of turkey soup! Gone, ALL GONE!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ralphie: Hey Dad! I'll bet you'll never guess what I got you for Christmas.
The Old Man: A new furnace.
Ralphie: Ha ha! That's a good one, Dad!
[Randy laughs]

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] Oh, life is like that. Sometimes, at the height of our revelries, when our joy is at it's zenith, when all is most right with the world, the most unthinkable disasters decend upon us.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Mr. Parker: Holy smokes. Do... Do you know what this is? This is... A lamp!
Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] It was indeed a lamp.
Mr. Parker: Isn't that great? What a great lamp.
Mother: I don't know...
Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] The old man's eyes boggled...
Mr. Parker: Oh WOW!
Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] ... Overcome by art.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Mr. Parker: Get in the car. Get in the car.
[Mother runs back inside]
Mr. Parker: If we don't hurry, we're gonna miss all the good trees!
Mr. Parker: [to the kids] Go on, go on.
Ralphie as Adult: [narrating, as Mother switches off the leg lamp] My mother was about to make another brilliant maneuver in the legendary battle of the lamp. The epic struggle which follows lives in the folklore of Cleveland Street to this very day.
Mother: Don't want to waste electricity.
Mr. Parker: [mockingly] "Don't want to waste electricity."

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[last lines]
Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] Next to me in the blackness lay my oiled blue steel beauty. The greatest Christmas gift I had ever received, or would ever receive. Gradually, I drifted off to sleep, pringing ducks on the wing and getting off spectacular hip shots.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] There has never been a kid who didn't believe vaguely but insistently that he would be stricken blind before he reached 21, and then they'd be sorry.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ralphie: [in his fantasy, Ralphie explains the cause of his blindness] It... It 'twas... soap poisoning!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Narrator: Was there no end to the conspiracy of irrational prejudice against Red Ryder and his peacemaker?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ralphie: [Giving his teacher a fruit basket instead of just an apple] I thought you might like something different.
Ralphie as Adult: Yes, clearly, a little bribe never hurts.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ralphie as Adult: I slowly began to realize that i was not going to be destroyed.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ralphie: Well, what have we got here, folks?
Mr. Parker: Well, we figure it's Black Bart, uh, Ralph.
Ralphie: Well, it's just me and my trusty old Red Ryder carbine-action, 200-shot, range model air rifle. Lucky I got a compass in the stock.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] Honors and benefits already at the age of nine!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ralphie: Hey Dad! I bet you never guess what I got you for Christmas!
The Old Man: [staring blissfully into space] A new furnace?
Ralphie: [chuckling] He he, that's a good one Dad!
Randy: [lauging] He he he!
Ralphie as Adult: My old man was one of the most feared furnace fighters in Northern Indiana.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ralphie as Adult: My father's spare tires were only tires on the academic sense. They were round,and had once been made of rubber.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ralphie as Adult: Immediately, my feet began to sweat as those two fluffy little bunnies with a blue button eye stared supply up at me.
Mother: Come down so I can see you better.
Ralphie as Adult: I just hope Flick would never spot them as a word of this humiliation could make life at Warren G. Harding Elementary School a variatable Hell.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

And possibly the greatest moment in this movie was not a line at all but a gesture:

Went to the Myerson last night...

2010-11-29T16:08:00.004-06:00

and watched my wife conduct in front of a packed house. (Barney Fife moment)

She was fantastic as usual. The sound she gets from her choir is a step above. Because she knows what to look for and what pleases the ear, she is able to get the most out of her singers.

I am one proud husband.

Christmas is in full swing. The Polar Express is making the rounds at least every half hour. The blu-ray player is being used to within an inch of its life and the smells, Rosemary, and sights, lights galore, and sounds, those wonderful Christmas tunes, abound. Not only that they are all over the place.

I hope all is well with you and the true meaning of this season is at the forefront of your festivities.

Christ is born!

I am not quite sure how to segway into this next bit so...here goes...I am reposting an old post from a few years back. I re-read it and cracked myself up as I often do.

Hold it!

HOOOOOOOLD IT!

I did not do a review of all of my favorite Christmas movies. I did two but not the most important one. That will be tomorrow and Wednesday.

I will leave you with two quotes to tide you over...

"Pulverized!"

and

"Here's your hat. What's your hurry?"

Official put up Christmas day...

2010-11-27T22:14:00.002-06:00

we postponed a day because we had Kellys family over for Thanksgiving yesterday. I made my first turkey and dressing. Both came out very well if I do say so myself. I also made a sour cream orange pumpkin pie. Also quite delish.

Today we got the boxes down out of the attic and had at it. We set the train up for Ian. The Polar Express is up and running. Put up the Christmas lights. Started to put out the 15 boxes full of Christmas knick-knacks.

Put up the tree. All the kids helped with ornaments. The majority of the ornaments are on the bottom quarter of the tree and on one side. Oh well. It still is cool they are all old enough to do it...and want to.

Watched many movies; Santa Clause, The Polar Express, Frosty the Snowman, Elf, Santa Claus is Coming to Town, Barbie Nutcracker, Merry Christmas Charlie Brown, White Christmas and the Granddaddy of them all It's a Wonderful Life. Madison actually sat and watched most of it. I'm so proud.

Went and bought what I dub the allergic mans Christmas tree, a Rosemary bush. 3 of them to be exact. They smell so darn good. Like having a tree without the runny nose. I'm not allergic but my wife is.

Have they made any TV Christmas shows in the past 20 years that are a must see? The Transformers Christmas? A very blue Smurf Holiday? I can't think-of-a-one. What a pity. I wonder if my kids will be showing Charlie Brown and Rudolph and Frosty to their kids while using phrases like, "They don't make 'em like this anymore?"

Christmastime...

2010-11-26T10:19:00.003-06:00

is here!

All through the year we've waited.
Waited through spring and fall.
To hear silver bells ringing see winter time bringing
the happiest season of all.

Love and Joy come to you!
And to you your Christmas too!
And God bless you and send you
A Happy New Year!
And God send you a Happy New Year!

This year I hope to update daily. I will reuse some old posts as they still ring true.

I will leave you today with my wifes favorite Christmas song. From Mr Christmas himself; Andy Williams sings "It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year!"

Can't you just see the people skating, having snowball fights, skiing, sledding, tobogganing, making snow angels, decorating houses, trees, the whole nine yards, singing carols, roasting chestnuts (which we actually did this year already), drinking hot totties. You know, just being...

happy!

The cornucopia...

2010-11-25T08:14:00.002-06:00

The horn a' plenty!

The cornucopia (Latin: Cornu Copiae) is a symbol of food and abundance dating back to the 5th century BC, also referred to as the food of worship and holiness, Horn of Amalthea, harvest cone, and horn of plenty.

See!

In these days of haste and speed,
Know the difference between want and need.
Anything replaceable doesn't fall in the latter.
Anything in the former doesn't really matter.
Can you replace a touch, a feeling, a smile?
The warmth of love stretched across the miles?
Today we take the time to say,
Something we should everyday.
Thank You God for your gifts to me.
My happiness, health and my life-affirming family.

Hello there...

2010-11-23T19:04:00.002-06:00

long time no see...or read...or blog. Whatever.

Much ado since I last blogged. I had a birthday. The big 4...3. 43 is just one of those birthdays, you know? It's as close to another day as a birthday can get. 40 was fun. Kelly threw me a surprise party. Since then, meh.

To this day I search the internet for those born on my day, October 28. Most of them are known to me; Jonas Salk, Bruce Jenner, Charlie Daniels. Then you get the ones who become famous and are new; Bill Gates, Jami Gertz and the best one of all Sipowitz himself, Dennis Franz. That makes up for Julia Roberts, blech.

My youngest daughter, Reagan, also had a birthday. She's 3 now. What a joy she is...sometimes. Willful! Holy cow! Does everything her older siblings do. Won't take no for an answer and won't take help for anything.

But we love her.

I seem to recall there was also an election of some sort. Booyaw! Cleaned their clocks!

I love watching the MSM and liberal pundits try to explain it away. They have absolutely no clue as to why this happened. They think it's because Obama didn't tout his message enough when in reality he did just the opposite. The people heard the message and didn't like it. I hope the left continues on this path because they will nationalize themselves into oblivion.

Unless of course the new congress spends like the Repubs did under W. Then I believe that will be the end of the Republican party and an amalgam of the libertarians and tea partiers will emerge. Focusing mainly on fiscal issues and being socially moderate. If they are pro-life, count me in.

Getting ready for Thanksgiving and then the most wonderful time of the year. I was a little lax last year in my duties regarding this site and Christmas. Rest assured it won't happen again.

I have more faith this year because when I switched over to the one station in town playing Christmas music the first song I heard was Little Saint Nick by The Beach Boys and I am still in the Christmas spirit. If hearing that piece of drivel and possibly the worst Christmas song ever written, didn't dampen my spirits, nothing can!

My son cracks me up...

2010-10-18T10:41:00.002-05:00

The other day I was watching a movie and he came into the room and asked:

Does this movie have a robot?
No.
(Looks at the the tv then back at me) A monster?
Nope.
A gorilla?
Not that either.
(He raises his arms with palms up) What's going on here?
(He starts to walk out of the room turns at the doorway points his finger in the air) A talking tree?
Nope.
(He shrugs his shoulders and goes on his merry way.)

And last night he came into the kitchen, where Kelly and I were talking, with a blanket on his head. He told us he was Jesus. He then asked if we knew where our son was. We said no as he ripped the blanket off his head revealing our son. He was very proud. He did the same thing as Yoda.

It's not often you hear yourself say, "Ian, Jesus and Yoda were just here looking for you."

From the WSJ editorials...

2010-10-11T10:25:00.001-05:00

This should frighten the heck out of all of us...

If at first you don't succeed, get some friends in high places to shut your opponents up. That's the latest Washington power play, as Democrats and liberals attack the Chamber of Commerce and independent spending groups in an attempt to stop businesses from participating in politics.

Since the Supreme Court's January decision in Citizens United v. FEC, Democrats in Congress have been trying to pass legislation to repeal the First Amendment for business, though not for unions. Having failed on that score, they're now turning to legal and political threats. Funny how all of this outrage never surfaced when the likes of Peter Lewis of Progressive insurance and George Soros helped to make Democrats financially dominant in 2006 and 2008.

Chairman Max Baucus of the powerful Senate Finance Committee got the threats going last month when he asked Internal Revenue Service Commissioner Douglas Shulman to investigate if certain tax exempt 501(c) groups had violated the law by engaging in too much political campaign activity. Lest there be any confusion about his targets, the Montana Democrat flagged articles focused on GOP-leaning groups, including Americans for Job Security and American Crossroads.

Mr. Baucus was seconded last week by the ostensibly nonpartisan campaign reform groups Democracy 21 and the Campaign Legal Center, which asked the IRS to investigate whether Crossroads is spending too much money on campaigns. Those two outfits swallowed their referee whistle in the last two campaign cycles, but they're all worked up now that Republicans might win more seats. Crossroads GPS, a 501(c)(4) affiliate of American Crossroads supported by Karl Rove, is a target because it has spent millions already in this election cycle.

Last Tuesday, the liberal blog ThinkProgress, run by the Center for American Progress Action Fund, reported that the U.S. Chamber of Commerce had collected some $300,000 in annual dues from foreign companies. Since the money went into the Chamber's general fund, the allegation is that it could have been used to pay for political ads, which would violate a ban on foreign companies participating in American elections. The Chamber says it uses no foreign money for its political activities and goes to great lengths to raise separate funds for political purposes.

That didn't stop President Obama from raising the issue in a Maryland speech last week, saying that "groups that receive foreign money are spending huge sums to influence American elections." Within hours of the ThinkProgress report, the bully boys at MoveOn.org asked the Department of Justice to launch a criminal investigation of the Chamber. In a letter to the Federal Election Commission, Minnesota Senator Al Franken expressed his profound concern that "foreign corporations are indirectly spending significant sums to influence American elections through third-party groups." From the man who stole his Senate election in a dubious recount, this is rich.

Even Mr. Franken admits in his letter that the Chamber's commingling of funds in its general accounts is not "per se illegal," but apparently he thinks it's fine to unleash federal investigators because the Chamber cash might contribute to the defeat of fellow Democrats.

The outrage over the Chamber is especially amusing considering the role of foreigners in U.S. labor unions. According to the Center for Competitive Politics, close to half of the unions that are members of the AFL-CIO are international. One man's corporate commingling is another's union dues.

Unions and liberal groups are hardly cash poor this year in any case. The Campaign Media Analysis Group looked at the combined spending of candidates, their parties and outside groups and found that Democrats outspent Republicans $47.3 million to $40.8 million in a recent 60-day period.

Democrats claim only to favor "disclosure" of donors, but their legal intimidation attempts are the best argument against disclosure. Liberals want the names of business donors made public so they can become targets of vilification with the goal of intimidating them into silence. A CEO or corporate board is likely to think twice about contributing to a campaign fund if the IRS or prosecutors might come calling. If Democrats can reduce business donations in the next three weeks, they can limit the number of GOP challengers with a chance to win and reduce Democratic Congressional losses.

The strategy got a test drive in Minnesota earlier this year after Target Corporation donated $100,000 cash and $50,000 of in-kind contributions to an independent group that ran ads supporting the primary candidacy of Republican gubernatorial candidate Tom Emmer. MoveOn.org accused the company of being anti-gay, organized a petition, and crafted a TV ad urging shoppers to boycott Target stores. Target made no further donations, and other companies that once showed an interest have since declined to contribute.

***
Then there's the curious reference to the tax status of Koch Industries by White House chief economist Austan Goolsbee. In a late August conference call with reporters, Mr. Goolsbee cited the closely-held Koch as an example of "really giant firms" that pay no corporate income tax because they file under other tax rules. But how in the world would Mr. Goolsbee know Koch's tax status? Could his knowledge be related to the White House-liberal campaign against Koch for contributing to Americans for Prosperity, a group that is supporting free-market candidates for Congress this year?

In an August 9 speech, Mr. Obama personally trashed Americans for Prosperity, hinting that it was funded by "a big oil company." He had to mean Koch, which makes no secret of its support for Americans for Prosperity.

The White House didn't respond to queries about Mr. Goolsbee's remark for weeks until GOP Senators requested an investigation. The Treasury's inspector general for tax matters has since announced such a probe, and last week White House spokesman Robert Gibbs finally got around to explaining that Mr. Goolsbee's statement "was not in any way based on any review of tax filings" and that he won't use the example again.

We're glad to hear it, but pardon our skepticism given the ferocity of this White House-led campaign against businesses that donate to political campaigns. Faced with electoral repudiation as the public turns against their agenda, Democrats are unleashing government power to silence their political opponents. Instead of piling on, the press corps ought to blow the whistle on this attempt to stifle political speech. This is one more liberal abuse of power that voters should consider as they head to the polls.

Don't let it be said...

2010-10-05T14:45:00.000-05:00

I don't bring culture to this blog.

I think I've blogged about this before...

2010-10-03T20:53:00.002-05:00

but it bears repeating.

Because of my illness, for those of you that don't know I had pneumonia, I was out of sorts for a long while. Almost two months.

Well, I finally made it back to church the past couple of weeks and I gotta tell ya, it feels good.

When I was in college I went a long time without attending a mass...a long time. Never missed it that much. Probably because I was in college and thought I knew better. Luckily I wised up.

It brings me peace and serenity to hear the word of God. To know that He will always be there no matter what I do or where I go is a pretty humbling concept.

I am human and I do things I shouldn't do...often...and repeatedly. Yet despite those frailties, He is there. Sometimes waiting. Sometimes embracing.

But always there.

Kelly gets on to me about how much I tell the kids about politics. For instance, they all know we don't like liberals. Why? Because they think they know better how to spend our money than we do.

But contrary to popular belief I know when to draw the line.

Last night we went to On the Border and they are partnering with the Susan G Komen foundation on the big walk for the cure. You can buy shirts and bracelets and knick knacks all to help the cause. We politely declined.

Madison asked why she couldn't have a shirt and why we wouldn't give money to that organization. I didn't tell her it was because Susan G Komen gives to Planned Pernthood the leading abortion provider in the US. No. I told her because we just didn't have enough money.

She doesn't need to be thinking about those things at her age. Too much.

But you're never too young to be weary of liberals.

I have been derelict in my duties...

2010-10-02T08:36:00.012-05:00

what with all the political postings, I have been remiss on regaling you with stories of what's going on with my family and me.

So...what's going on?

Nothin'

Except for Madison's birthday party a few weeks ago. She is 8 years old. She told us she wanted a book party. Apropos because she is a voracious reader. She reads all the time.

Kelly, as she tends to do, took this idea, ran with it and made it the best darn book party you could have imagined. She went to many Barnes and Nobles and asked if they had any children's book displays left over she could have for her daughter's birthday. We got tons of stuff. We also got tons of stuff from Madison's Aunt Kim.

On top of that, she asked that everyone come dressed as their favorite book character. All 24 guests came dressed up. That was really cool. They all dressed up.

We played pin the hat on the life size cat. Had a treasure hunt and played book bingo.

Madison was Junie B Jones.

It was a great party! Great idea! Great execution! Just Great!

Now if we travel further back in time, we can see, through the mist that always seems to accompany a travel back in time, our trip to Corpus Christi/San Antonio.

We had a wonderful time. Stayed at a Condo right on the beach. Weather was good. Except for the 101 degree temperature I was running, it was a grand trip.

This one's for you, dad. Aboard the USS Lexington.

This one even has me speechless...

2010-10-01T15:46:00.002-05:00

Sort of.

What makes this fascinating is that the people who produce this dreck have no clue as to just how far removed they have become from normal human sensibilities, or at least they didn’t until the video began provoking the fully-predictable reaction. They have become so wrapped up in Gaia that they seem to have little connection to humanity.

The other, mainly unrelated point that comes to mind is that this represents a reductio ad absurdum of the view from the hard Left about how dissent gets treated by the mainstream American populace, vis-a-vis the Iraq war especially. Can you imagine the reaction had an organization like Move America Forward produced a video like this, where those who didn’t support a robust strategy for the war on terror were blown up by a button-pushing advocate for the strategy? Especially children in a classroom being terrorized by their teacher into compliance with the groupthink?

Very disturbing images follow

Just so you know...

2010-09-28T11:32:00.004-05:00

I'm not all doom and gloom. This video brought a tear to my eye. The boy running the ball is 17 year old junior Ike Ditzenberger of Snohomish High in Washington.

He has Downs syndrome.

The 51 yard run for the touchdown proved to be the only points for Snohomish that night. They went down to Lake Stevens 35-6. I don't think that is what this game will be remembered for.

The best thing about this video is the opposing players making diving efforts to stop him but to no avail. Ike proved just too fast.

I don't care what the score was. All the players and coaches on both sides of the ball won that night.

Why don't you watch the Family Guy?...

2010-09-25T10:47:00.003-05:00

I have been asked this by more than a few people and family members to boot. This is why:

Appearing as a guest on Friday’s Real Time with Bill Maher on HBO, Family Guy creator Seth MacFarlane made a crack about his willingness to have sex with Delaware Republican Senate nominee Christine O’Donnell after host Maher showed a clip of O’Donnell from a Politically Incorrect episode from 1998. After a clip of the GOP candidate in which denied believing in the theory of evolution, MacFarlane declared, "I would, I would wreck that chick."

According to its definition at urbandictionary.com, the term "wreck" was apparently first used in a sexual sense in an episode of MacFarlane’s crude Family Guy show on Fox. Maher laughed while there was only mild laughter from the audience.

I'm not going to watch a show made by a guy who thinks raping conservative women is a punch line. No. What I'd like to do is pound this douches face in.

And where are the "feminists" on this. Not a peep.

Seems to be a trend here.

I touched on this a little earlier...

2010-09-25T08:57:00.001-05:00

This might explain a little better how big of a story this should be. From the Washington Times:

Assistant Attorney General Thomas E. Perez has an obligation to clean house at the Justice Department's Civil Rights Division. That's clear after explosive new whistle-blower testimony under oath Friday in the New Black Panther Party voter-intimidation case, which triggers a pledge Mr. Perez made under oath on May 14. Failure to fire some officials and to radically revamp practices in the Civil Rights Division would represent clear dereliction of duty by Mr. Perez.

Friday's testimony to the U.S. Commission on Civil Rights came from much-decorated Justice Department veteran Christopher Coates, a hero of the civil rights legal community when he was a lawyer for the American Civil Liberties Union. "The election of President Obama," he said, "brought to positions of influence and power with the Civil Rights Division many of the very people who had demonstrated hostility to the concept of equal enforcement of the Voting Rights Act."

Mr. Coates named names and gave numerous examples of how the division and its political supervisors refuse to enforce civil rights laws to protect white victims against black perpetrators. He said his supervisor, Loretta King, then serving in a political position as acting assistant attorney general, specifically forbade him from asking prospective employees if they would be willing to enforce civil rights laws in a race-neutral manner. Additionally, he testified that the department under Mr. Perez has refused to enforce federal law that requires states to remove ineligible voters - including dead people and incarcerated felons - from their voting rolls. Mr. Coates officially recommended a full year ago that the department enforce the law against at least eight states that were flagrantly noncompliant, but Mr. Perez and the Obama team ignored the issue.

All of this puts Mr. Perez, among others, in a bind. Not only is some of Mr. Perez's sworn testimony misleading, but his pledge to crack down against employees who act in a race-biased manner is being put to the test. On May 14, under questioning from Civil Rights Commissioner Todd Gaziano about employees making racialist nonenforcement statements and decisions, Mr. Perez said four different times that he would not put up with what he called "people of that ilk." Mr. Perez indignantly challenged Mr. Gaziano, "If you have such a statement, bring such a statement to our attention."

Mr. Coates now has confirmed sworn testimony from other witnesses that Mr. Perez's team did and continues to act in a race-biased manner. Mr. Coates swore that he told the same thing to Mr. Perez before Mr. Perez testified in May. Even before that, multiple press reports dating back to last September indicated this allegation of racialist nonenforcement of voting rights laws was a serious concern. Yet Mr. Perez seems to have questioned nobody about it, disciplined nobody over it or raised a finger to address the problem.

This broad issue of deliberately unequal enforcement of the law is the main point of the Black Panther investigation. The evidence points to racially unequal enforcement - and a dangerous abrogation of justice.

4000 holes in Blackburn, Lancashire indeed...

2010-09-24T18:27:00.001-05:00

A Roman Catholic primary school could become the first in the country to be run by a mosque after a dramatic rise in the number of Muslim pupils, it emerged today

Church bosses want to close Sacred Heart RC Primary School, in Blackburn, Lancashire, because the number of Catholic students has plummeted from 91 per cent to just three per cent in a decade.

In what would be the first case of its kind in Britain, the primary would be handed over to another organisation to run - most likely the local Tauheedul mosque - and re-opened with a new name.

Around 95 per cent of the school's 200 pupils are of Asian origin. Many do not speak English as their first language and the majority follow the Islamic faith.

The Diocese of Salford has told Blackburn with Darwen Borough Council that it no longer believes it is “appropriate” for the church to be in charge.

Hope and Change, Baby!...

2010-09-24T18:00:00.001-05:00

Christopher Coates testimony to the Civil Rights Commission contains at least one bombshell, which is that Obama appointee Loretta King ordered Coates to stop asking applicants whether they supported race-neutral enforcement of the Voting Rights Act. The question became necessary because of resistance in the Civil Rights division from career attorneys to enforce the law when it resulted in African-American defendants rather than victims, an attitude that Coates first encountered in the Bush era:

Opposition within the Voting Section was widespread to taking actions under the VRA on behalf of white voters in Noxubee County, MS, the jurisdiction in which Ike Brown was and is the Chairman of the local Democratic Executive Committee. In 2003, white voters and candidates complained to the Voting Section that elections had been administered in a racially discriminatory manner and asked that federal observers be sent to the primary run-off elections. Career attorneys in the Voting Section recommended that we not even go to Noxubee County for the primary run-off to do election coverage, but that opposition to going to Noxubee was overridden by the Bush Administration’s CRD Front Office. I went on the coverage and while traveling to Mississippi, the Deputy Chief who was leading that election coverage asked me, “can you believe that we are going to Mississippi to protect white voters?” What I observed on that election coverage was some of the most outrageous and blatant racially discriminatory behavior at the polls committed by Ike Brown and his allies that I have seen or had reported to me in my thirty-three plus years as a voting rights litigator.

Eventually, a judge agreed with Coates’ assessment after the Department of Justice won an injunction against Brown and the Democratic Executive Committee, which was held up on appeal. That was the first time that the DoJ had pursued prosecution under the VRA against African-American defendants, and it rankled many within the CRD. When Coates took over the division, he began asking in job interviews whether applicants could work on similar cases in the future, but got slapped down for it:

In the spring of 2009, Ms. King, who had by then been appointed Acting AAG for Civil Rights by the Obama Administration, called me to her office and specifically instructed me that I was not to ask any other applicants whether they would be willing to, in effect, race-neutrally enforce the VRA. Ms. King took offense that I was asking such a question of job applicants and directed me not to ask it because she does not support equal enforcement of the provisions of the VRA and had been highly critical of the filing and prosecution of the Ike Brown case.

The American view of the rule of law is clear: laws are to be enforced equally on all people, and prosecutions should not be predicated on ethnicity or other biases. The court ruled that Ike Brown broke the law. If so, why wouldn’t Justice prosecute and enforce the VRA for all American citizens?

Please watch both videos...

2010-09-21T21:02:00.001-05:00

The first one is an eyewitness to a robbery who is funny enough but someone remixed that video and hilarity ensues. Excellent remix and editing. Absolutely hilarious.

"Global Warming"..well...

2010-09-20T10:20:00.003-05:00

"Climate Change"...not so fast...

"Global Climate Disruption"...yea! That's the ticket!

Gag me with a spoon.

Tell me you couldn't see this coming? Global warming was far too constricting especially when the science behind it was proven as worthless as the paper it was written on. Climate Change was a little broader and could be used to scare a little more but the phrase made the act sound too natural. Like it was something that happened regardless if a man used spray on deodorant. Nope that just wouldn't do.

"Global Climate Disruption"

Now that says it all. "Global" is a powerful all-encompassing term. The word itself conjures up images of the four corners of the blue planet and all who inhabit it.

"Climate" at least they didn;t feel the need to enhance that aspect of it.

"Disruption" Now here's the piece de resistance. A disruption is a break in the natural flow of things. A disruption is never a peaceful process. It can be violent but always obtrusive. With this one word, they have injected man into the fray again. Man. Bad bad man. Unthinking neanderthal man. Put away that aerosol can and save the planet. Buy a Prius and feel good about yourself!

Let us redistribute the wealth to combat this disruption in the global climate.

Don't you believe for a second that the whole Globalclimatechangewarmingdisruption is not about that last sentence. It has nothing to do with the climate and its natural cycles. It has to do with radical 60's hippies and their hatred for capitalism.

I may sound like a conspiracy theorist but before you judge me go Google "Cap and Trade" and see what pops up.

It's unconstitutional to commemorate the constitution or something...

2010-09-15T09:58:00.001-05:00

Local officials in Ohio’s Andover Township have denied the use of their public square for a celebration of Constitution Day because of the “political affiliation” of its organizers.

Several residents of the small central Ohio town formed The Andover Tea Party in May 2010, and in that same month, they asked to use the square for a rally to commemorate Constitution Day, which celebrates the anniversary of the signing of the U.S. Constitution on September 17, 1787.

But on July 19, a trustee informed one of the tea party organizers, Margaret Slingluff, that they would not be allowed to hold the event, which would have included singers performing patriotic songs and public policy-related speakers, in the square. In an official letter dated Aug. 25, the trustee said the reason was “due to your group’s political affiliation.”

A nonpartisan law center in the state, the 1851 Center for Constitutional Law, has now filed a lawsuit in federal court on behalf of the Tea Party group, claiming their First Amendment rights are being violated.

“The first thing that you note is the extreme irony of the unconstitutional prohibition of the commemoration of the Constitution,” Executive Director Maurice Thompson, the lawyer of record on the case, told CNSNews.com of the incident.

“[A]nd the second thing that’s notable is either the extreme arrogance or ignorance of many local government officials. There’s so much focus on federal government, yet some of the worst actors are at the ground level,” Thompson said.

“The government’s action in this case, ironically, demonstrates the need for greater public understanding of Constitutional rights,” Thompson added in a written statement. “One way to do that is through commemoration of Constitution Day.”

According to their suit filed in U.S. District Court in northern Ohio, the group is seeking a temporary restraining order against the action of the Andover Township trustees.

In the complaint, Thompson writes, “It cannot be contested or doubted that the speech in which Plaintiffs seek to engage—honoring and discussing the fundamental law of this nation, i.e., the Constitution—is at the core of the speech protected by the First Amendment. And no venue could further reinforce such message as doing so in the center and heart of the community.

“In this case, the communicative nature of Plaintiffs’ proposed activities, as well as the selection of the venue for such speech, is indisputably protected by the First Amendment.”

Elaborating to CNSNews.com, Thompson explained that the trustees were citing a local resolution, Andover Township Resolution 06-104, that simply “prohibit[ed] any for-profit advertising or political signs on the Andover Square” and stated that “permission to use the square is made by the trustees on a case-by-case basis.

Based on that, Thompson said the problem was not so much that the group was conservative, but that the trustees believed celebrating the signing of the Constitution was a political event.

“It wasn’t necessarily that this group was disqualified because they’re a Tea Party group that may be considered of a particular political persuasion, but it really was more that the celebration of Constitution Day was considered by the trustees to be less like Memorial Day or Veterans’ Day or 4th of July and more like a political event for whatever reason,” he told CNSNews.com.

“The Constitution Day is a commemoration of the day the Constitution was implemented, and the 4th of July is simply the day the Declaration of Independence was authored—similarly it’s a legal document. So we consider it analogous and not really worthy of a legitimate sanction,” Thompson added.

Of course, the Constitution has a political philosophy and overtones, but it’s kind of a given that you subscribe to that.”

The judge on the case, Judge Donald Nugent, is expected to make a decision in time for the holiday on Sept. 17.

“We expect to get a restraining order before the 17th so that these citizens can have their commemoration and engage in this speech. It’s pretty—it’s a pretty straightforward First Amendment question. You can’t ban speech upon its content.

We feel pretty good about our chances here,” he said, “and we had a quick call with the judge this morning, and they—the judge told the township, ‘Look, you’re not in a very strong position here, so it’ll be in your interest to try to settle this matter,’ and they gave us 24 hours to do that. So, we expect the township to capitulate perhaps by (Wednesday) morning and enter into an agreement with us.”

Just in the past year, the township has allowed events on the public square including a Memorial Day Parade, “Christmas on the Square,” an Easter Egg Hunt, a charitable school supplies drive, and an annual Fall festival.

The trustees did not immediately return calls from CNSNews.com seeking to find out why they believed a Constitution Day rally did not belong among those.

“You know, the First Amendment is something that everybody knows enough about to make this an easy issue,” Thompson said. “These people again are either ill-intentioned or thoughtless, and we really don’t know which. Either is bad government.”

I'm not shocked anymore...

2010-09-14T13:34:00.003-05:00

just pissed.

Justice Stephen Breyer told George Stephanopoulus on Sunday he didn't know if Koran burning was covered under the first ammendment. Never mind that flag burning was covered twice:

In both Texas v Johnson and US v Eichman, the court ruled that free speech trumped any offense and/or concerns about public safety raised by burning the American flag.

This is key. Breyer is afraid of the Religion of Peace and what they might do so he concludes burning a Koran is not covered under the first ammendment. However, I guess Justice Breyer is not familiar with the rulings of Johnson or Eichman which state:

The State’s position … amounts to a claim that an audience that takes serious offense at particular expression is necessarily likely to disturb the peace and that the expression may be prohibited on this basis. Our precedents do not countenance such a presumption. On the contrary, they recognize that a principal “function of free speech under our system of government is to invite dispute. It may indeed best serve its high purpose when it induces a condition of unrest, creates dissatisfaction with conditions as they are, or … even stirs people to anger.”

That just about covers it.

Under Breyers thinking would talk of a war in Pakistan be forboden? After all it may cause riots and killing in Pakistan or New York.

Is Breyer trying to put the Koran in its own category? Which, if so, would pretty much obliterate the other restriction in the first ammendment, the establishment clause regarding religion.

I don't believe Breyer could have been more wrong in this statement. But when you are delaing with the liberal mind there is no telling what they can justify to reach their ends.

I just wonder how many people we have to kill to make flag burning illegal?

Happy Birthday, Little One!...

2010-09-11T15:43:00.003-05:00

Madison is 8 years old today. Time sure flies.

She is a voracious reader about abook a day. And not "Cat in the Hat" either. I'm talking "Diary of a Wimpy Kid", "The Babysitter Club" books. I couldn't do that.

I'm glad that is the first thought in my head today and not the other thought most people have today. Perhaps because what happened today 9 years ago and what happened today 8 years ago are so intrinsically linked in my head is the reason I still have the resolve I do to see this through. I don't know.

I do know I view the following presentation on this date every year and I stiil cry.

I remember.

If above doesn't work, try this.

Catchy tune...

2010-09-09T17:01:00.001-05:00

This is a training video for Wendy's on serving hot drinks. It's got a Bobby Brown/R. Kelly vibe going on. It's a catchy tune. I would love to see the video for how they make the Frosty.

I'm getting there...

2010-09-07T11:43:00.002-05:00

I new I was almost back to normal when I started yelling at other drivers again.

Felt good.

We had a fraternity reunion a few weeks ago. I was wracked with pneumonia but went anyway. I had a good time. It was great to see some faces I hadn't seen in years. There are some very good men who are fellow Texas Kappa alums and I am quite proud to call them my brothers. None more so than my two blood and fraternity brothers, Mike and Steve. I don't say it often enough gents but I love you guys and I was very proud to have the three of us there representing the Pfaffenberger name. It meant quite a bit to me.

The worst part of the evening was actually getting to the ballroom. It was on a hill in the back of the hotel property. You had to walk outside, around the pool, up some stairs and finally up to the top of a hill on what seemdd like a 45 degree walkway.

I don't know if I've ever felt so bad in my whole life. By the time we were halfway up the hill, I could hardly breathe. I was gasping for air and could not catch my breath. It was scary I tells ya. I either had to stop and go sit or start walking faster to make it to the air conditioning.

I chose the latter which might not have been the best decision but I made it. I walked right by everyone saying hi to me and found an empty table inside. I later made my way around and apologized to everyone I had snubbed. Luckily, word had gotten out that I was sick and everyone understood.

I enjoyed my college time, probably a little too much, and most of it was because of the guys in that room.

Vive Sigma Phi Epsilon!

I would like to take the time to say I have the greatest wife in the history of mankind. She took care of the kids and I with complete and utter care and love. I can't begin to express how lucky I am to have a wife who is so adept at being selfless it makes you feel as if you've done something right to deserve her.

She always goes above and beyond. For the first UCLA game she bought football plates and napkins, laid out my UCLA helmet, a UCLA football, my UCLA chip and dip plate, my UCLA pom-pom and had a football crock pot to keep the cheese dip warm. Oh yea, she had a blue table cloth as well. She also made signs for Madison's lemonade stand. Had two kinds of lemonade and rice kripy squares for the patrons. Above and beyond indeed.

I don't get sick that often but when I do I am a wimp. So, she basically took care of four children for a month. It's almost over honey. I am feeling like my old self again.

UCLA football is upon us!!

First game was last week. We lost to Kansas State. I was pretty bummed. Still am. We have better talent and should have won. It comes down to coaching. Stanford this week. We probably won't win this game either but if we show improvement I'll be happier.

I plan on posting some political stuff again. Just had to get my strength back. the Man-Child hasn't disappointed.

Pneumonia sucks...

2010-08-25T13:35:00.002-05:00

that is the summary since I last posted.

We went on vacation to the beach. Had a fraternity reunion shindig. First day of school. All happened while I had pneumonia.

It all started on the first day of our vacation, Sunday. We drove down to San Antonio and spent the night in a hotel on the river. 16th floor. I love being high up in a hotel. It is one of my favorite things. Kids loved it too. As we got settled, I felt a little warm. I brushed it off as being in the car for 5 hours in the sun blah blah blah.

We rested for a while before dinner but I seemed to be getting warmer. Kelly, who is the greatest packer in the world, broght the thermometer so I took it. 101.1.

D'OH!

The kids and Kelly went on to dinner and called me when they were seated so I didn't have to sit in the heat.

We had a nice meal albeit the service was slow, which became somewhat of a theme for the week. We headed back upstairs and watched a movie or somesuch and all went to sleep. I took two aleve and was prepared to be my old self by morning.

Woke up, went and had breakfast at a place not too far from the hotel. Good stuff. Then went on the river boat. Hot. Not too crowded though which was nice.

Madison and Kelly went to the Alamo and I took the little ones back to the hotel so I could rest. Starting to feel a litte fatigued but no great shakes.

We drove down to the beach and found our condo. Nice place. I again had a fever of 100 but Kelly had to go get groceries and the kids wanted to go to the beach. So off we went. I found a shaded chair and the kids played in the surf for about an hour.

We went back upstairs and Kelly got home and we ate. I took two more aleve to squelch the fever, a ritual that took place every day for the next 10 days, and we eventually fell asleep.

The week was a flurry of beach, pool, aleve, aquarium, aleve, the USS Lexington, seafood and aleve.

Everybody had fun but I could feel myself losing energy as the week progressed. I am glad I was able to do most things. The only thing I didn't do was the last swim in the pool before we left.

One thing I am glad I did was the Lexington. The history of the ship and what it had done. Makes you proud to be an American.

We made it home safe and sound. I just wish healthy was part of that.

Pneumonia saps you of every ounce of energy you ever thought you could possibly have. And then some. The hacking cough. The old lady 40 year smoker voice. It's not good.

I will regail you all later with the fraternity reunion and back to school stories. Right now though I'm beat.

Take some time...

2010-08-15T21:31:00.001-05:00

and look at these pictures. They are from the 30's and 40's. Color. Beautiful.

Here you go.

Do you remember...

2010-08-05T17:41:00.002-05:00

the first time you saw it snow?
rotary phones?
the first time you saw your significant other?
riding bikes all day...with no supervision?
your first kiss?
your first car?
the first time you saw your favorite movie?
your first love?
barrel full o' monkeys?
how your spouse looked on your wedding day?
why you fell in love?
Asteroids?
talking all night?
baseball cards in the spokes?
your first date?
bomb pops?
push ups?
your first job?
being unselfish?
Chuck Cunningham? (long lost brother on Happy Days)
Happy Days for that matter?
Atari?
turning the channels by hand?
the last time you prayed?
reading your favorite book?
full serve gas stations?
laughing so hard you cried?

Well?...

Great question...

2010-08-04T08:07:00.002-05:00

In watching this video two things strike me: Nancy Pelosi is not a smart woman and she is not a Catholic.

Right to Word?

I knew it I knew it...

2010-08-03T09:25:00.002-05:00

I said to Kelly "Doesn't it seem like they are giving a lot more coverage to Chelsae Clinton's weeding than they did Jenna Bush's?" In typical wifey fashion, she says "No it seems about the same."

Steam out of ears.

Well, now I have the proof...

Did you hear Chelsea Clinton got married over the weekend? If it seems like that's all the media talked about, you're not alone.

The broadcast networks - ABC, CBS and NBC - aired 87 stories about Clinton's July 31 nuptials between July 25 and August 1. Four major newspapers - The Washington Post, The New York Times, the Los Angeles Times and USA Today - printed 21 stories during the same time period.

Coverage of Clinton's wedding was decidedly enthusiastic. The "CBS Evening News" July 31 reported it at the top of the broadcast, ahead of the oil spill. Anchor Jeff Glor announced the "wedding of the century" that "has clearly captured the nation's attention."

NBC's "Saturday Today" show brought in "celebrity wedding planner" Colin Cowie and US Weekly Editor Lindsay Powers to dish on all the gossip surrounding the event. The show mentioned Clinton's wedding in seven stories on July 31.

"Saturday Today" even brought in sometime correspondent Jenna Bush Hager - daughter of former President George W. Bush - to report on the public's supposed fascination with first children's weddings.

NBC led all coverage of Clinton's wedding with 59 stories during the period examined, almost as many as all three networks combined reported on the wedding of former first daughter Jenna Bush in 2008. ABC, CBS and NBC aired a total of 59 stories about Bush's wedding during the same time period surrounding the May 11, 2008, event.

The 48-percent increase in coverage on the networks was similar to the 52-percent increase in coverage of Clinton's wedding over Bush's in the four major newspapers. The publications ran 21 stories about Bush's wedding compared to 32 about Clinton's.

Don't tell me I'm crazy. I may very well be...just don't tell me.

What they think...

2010-08-03T07:48:00.001-05:00

For a little background, Stark, the guy in the video, once told a constituent that he, Stark, wouldn't waste his urine on him, the constituent.

Here's a situation for you...

2010-08-01T16:51:00.002-05:00

a new neighbor moved in next door. Nice family. Two kids about the same ages as Ian and Reagan. Could be a really good thing.

Here's the situation, their back yard butts up against our front yard. They face a street that my street T's into. If I were standing at my front door looking at the street, their house is to my right. He wants to build a fence which would hinder some of my view to the right. At least he doesn't want to build an 8 ft wood fence. It's simply a 4 ft iron fence.

He does want to build it 12 ft closer to the street than allowed. He went to the city council and asked for a permit to be able to do that. He did ask me about my feelings about this and if I had any objections. I said it was his property and he could do what he wanted. I didn't want to be a jerk.

Should I have told the city council I didn't want this fence built? At least the 12 feet closer to the street part? I didn't know how to do that without being a bad neighbor.

I don't mind him building a fence I just wish he would have done it within the guidelines put down by the city.

I don't know. I am far too concerned with what people think. I want people to like me so I don't rock the boat....believe it or not. It's true.

I write this as I hear him taking down his chain link fence.

From the "Let them eat cake" dept...

2010-07-28T11:34:00.002-05:00

After Obama declared in a July 27, 2010 interview with ABC's Elizabeth Leamy, “We’re not that far removed from what most Americans are going through," we find out that Michelle Obama has booked a very expensive vacation to Spain accompanied by "long-time family friends". The liberal media that did decide to cover it calls it a "private" vacation, but since when have the Obama's used their own money?

The hotel in which she is staying is a 5 star $2895 dollar a night establishment. Let's say she spends 5 nights. A week? Sounds reasonable. That would be $14475. Not bad I suppose. She is a first lady after all. Wouldn't want her staying at the Motel 6 Barcelona.

Did I forget to mention she rented 30 rooms per night for the family, friends and entourage?

That bill comes out to $434250.

That's just for the rooms. Doesn't include travel, food, knick-knacks for the kid, she is only taking one of them and the Man-Child is staying home too.

I'm going on vacation in a few weeks too. Mustang Island. I'm driving. Staying in a $300 a night condo. All 5 of us will be in there.

I'd call that even.

A week of firsts...

2010-07-26T13:27:00.002-05:00

at the Pfaffenberger household.

Kids use chop-a-stick for first time. Madison had actually used them once before so she was an old pro. Ian did very well. He scooped up the noodles with his sticks and actually was full by the end of the meal.Reagan used them mostly as drumsticks but they were used nonetheless.

We also went and saw our friends new baby, Sarah Beth. She is 6 weeks old.

I remember those days. Not being 6 weeks old but having a 6 week old baby of course. Never knowing exactly what to do. Just giving it your best guess with the oodles of literature you had read on rearing children. And still feeling as if you aren't doing it right.

Also, this week our oldest daughter Madison went off to girl scout camp where she is sleeping over for two whole nights. Her first sleep over camp. She has slept over at a friends house but that was a block away and could come home if need be. We, Kelly and I, dropped her off on Sunday afternoon up near Paris about 1 1/2 hours away. It was a picturesque camp complete with pine trees, cabins, mess hall, firepits and a lake for canoeing and swimming.

She was a rock. Wish her old man could say the same. I had to pull her back to give me a hug and a kiss. She was ready to run right off and go do the crafts.

I have thought about her a lot since yesterday. And will a lot until tomorrow I'm sure. It's strange not to know where she is or what she is doing. Knowing that if she really needed you it would take some time to get there. That is not what I am dwelling on but it has crossed my mind once or twice.

She could meet a girl she is friends with for the rest of her life at this camp. She will learn new things. Hear different points of view. She is a wonderful person and I know it will be the experience of a life time for her.

I still won't rest easy until she is home safe and sound.

Always room for a good video...

2010-07-22T14:07:00.000-05:00

I have wanted to post about...

2010-07-22T08:52:00.002-05:00

so many things lately but they are coming in too fast and furiously.

The DOJ dropping the New Black Panther case despite having these guys on tape intimidating voters. One of which was caught on tape in an earlier escapade saying the only way to get anything was to kill some crackers i.e. white people and to kill some crackers babies. You read that correctly. I guess this guy was just misunderstood.

The revelations coming out about Jounolist. An invitation only web site of journalists, acadmics and news people that pretty much proves what conservatives have been saying about the Main Stream Media (MSM) all along; they are a bunch of biased bozos. To be fair, I don't have an issue with them expressing their opinions on a website. Why would I? What I do object to is them trying to influence news and elections based on those views. They tried to suppress the Rev Wright story to protect Obama. They discussed their Palin strategy which seemed to take root. Can you guess what that strategy might have been?

Color me shocked...not so much.

After all that, the Man-Child signed the financial reform bill that will catalyze the process of sliding right into a depression.

I didn't think it was humanly possible for one man(-child) to screw up this country so quickly. But, he has done it. Wow...hats...off?

I am not all doom and gloom though. My business is going well. I guess I have the Man-Child to thank for that. < /sarcasm> For those of you that don't know the < /sarcasm> thing is a programmer joke. Most web sites are written in HTML code. The code has tags. For instance if I want to italicize some code I would put a "< i >" tag before and a "< /i >" tag after the desired text: for example

I start the italics with the first tag and I end the italics with the second tag. Therefore I was stopping my sarcasm with the tag.

A little long to go for a joke but the next time you see it you'll crack up. Trust me.

Kids are great. Doing the summer thing. Swimming, playing, slip and sliding, watching movies on our new big screen TV, whining that their is nothing to do.

Kelly is starting to show the strain as well. Summertime is in full swing. All kids all the time. She looks like she needs a vacation. Which she will get when we go to the beach in a few weeks. Although the thought of vacation is always much better than the actual vacation.

I think I mentiioned that once before.

From the WTF? department...

2010-07-17T12:33:00.002-05:00

In this age of near double digit unemployment, the national debt racing to near 3 trillion dollar levels - let me write that out for you so visually you can see it 3,000,000,000,000; yes that's 12 zeroes - people losing money left and right because the money they invested is going down the tubes, I read this in the paper about the Man-Child's vacation to Maine...

Arriving in a small jet before the Obamas was the first dog, Bo, a Portuguese water dog given as a present by the late U.S. Sen Ted Kennedy, D-Mass.; and the president's personal aide Reggie Love, who chatted with Baldacci.

Now to be fair, I don't have an issue with the President taking a vacation. He needs it. Toughest job in the world. I don't have a problem with his pet going along for company. Why should I?

What irks me beyond belief is the fact that he had said dog flown in a private jet by itself to their vacation destination.

Is Air Force One too small? Are the kids allergic to the dog?

I have no idea what would possess a man who is in charge of a country that is in a financial free fall to do such a thing. Well I have one idea. Let's just say I should start calling him King Man-Child.

Honestly! Doesn't this wreak of blue-blood, let them eat cake nobility? How out of touch is this guy?

I think the fact he had his dog flown to their vacation on its own jet is a clear indication.

You haven't lived...

2010-07-14T23:50:00.002-05:00

until you've watched a two year old dance, shaking her hands and moving her head, in the middle of the living room to Michael Jackson while singing, "They'll kick you and they'll beat you and they'll tell you it's fair! Just Beat it! Beat it!"

On key as well. Of the three, she has the best pitch.

Madison bought a 217 page book on Saturday morning about 11:00. She was done with it by Saturday night about 7:00.

The speed is amazing but I wanted to make sure she was comprehending as well. She gave me about a 5 minute synopsis of the story. I'd say her comprehension is up to par.

Ian continues to crack me up. Tonight he was walking to the bathroom and he tooted. He turned his torso around and looked down at his bottom and said in a voice that can only be described as Darth Vader on helium, "Please, stop tooting!"

Watching Amber our dog I have come to realize for a dog life resets every time the door is opened.

The Bulwer-Lytton Awards...

2010-07-07T13:12:00.002-05:00

For those of you that don't know, this award is named after Edward George Bulwer-Lytton a writer in the early 19th century. The contest challenges entrants to compose the opening sentence to the worst of all possible novels. the reason it is named after Bulwer-Lytton is...well read his opening sentence of Paul Clifford:

"It was a dark and stormy night; the rain fell in torrents--except at occasional intervals, when it was checked by a violent gust of wind which swept up the streets (for it is in London that our scene lies), rattling along the housetops, and fiercely agitating the scanty flame of the lamps that struggled against the darkness."

--Edward George Bulwer-Lytton, Paul Clifford (1830)

Not so good.

Following are a few of the winners and losers. Funny all the same...

Winner:
For the first month of Ricardo and Felicity's affair, they greeted one another at every stolen rendezvous with a kiss--a lengthy, ravenous kiss, Ricardo lapping and sucking at Felicity's mouth as if she were a giant cage-mounted water bottle and he were the world's thirstiest gerbil.

Runner Up:
Through the verdant plains of North Umbria walked Waylon Ogglethorpe and, as he walked, the clouds whispered his name, the birds of the air sang his praises, and the beasts of the fields from smallest to greatest said, "There goes the most noble among men" -- in other words, a typical stroll for a schizophrenic ventriloquist with delusions of grandeur.

Winner Childrens Lit:
“Please Mr. Fox, don’t take your magic back to the forest, it is needed here in Twigsville!” pleaded little Isabel, but Mr. Fox was unconcerned as he smugly loped back into the woods without answering a word knowing well that his magic was only going to be used to make sure his forest would be annexed into the neighboring community of Leaftown where the property values were much higher.

Winner Detective:
She walked into my office wearing a body that would make a man write bad checks, but in this paperless age you would first have to obtain her ABA Routing Transit Number and Account Number and then disable your own Overdraft Protection in order to do so.

Winner Fantasy Fiction:
The wood nymph fairies blissfully pranced in the morning light past the glistening dewdrops on the meadow thistles by the Old Mill, ignorant of the daily slaughter that occurred just behind its lichen-encrusted walls, twin 20-ton mill stones savagely ripping apart the husks of wheat seed, gleefully smearing the starchy entrails across their dour granite faces in unspeakable botanical horror and carnage – but that’s not our story; ours is about fairies!

Winner Purple Prose:
The dark, drafty old house was lopsided and decrepit, leaning in on itself, the way an aging possum carrying a very heavy, overcooked drumstick in his mouth might list to one side if he were also favoring a torn Achilles tendon, assuming possums have them.

Runner Up:
The wind whispering through the pine trees and the sun reflecting off the surface of Lake Tahoe like a scattering of diamonds was an idyllic setting, while to the south the same sun struggled to penetrate a sky choked with farm dust and car exhaust over Bakersfield, a town spread over the lower San Joaquin Valley like a brown stain on a wino’s trousers, which is where, unfortunately, this story takes place.

Winner Vile Puns:
It was a risky production unlike any mounted prior on the Met stage, the orchestra first imitating the perpetually beating heart of a man walled-in while in pursuit of wine , and then a soprano singing the plaintive aria of a barely alive woman stuffed up a chimney as her ancestral home was destroyed; however, it certainly was Opera Poe.

Runner Up:
As Jeffrey Hicks, the event safety coordinator for the Renaissance Festival finished posting the revised standards for weaponry, he thought of the day an unleashed dog wandered onto the jousting field, causing the rider from Indianapolis to stop short, impaling himself on the butt of his spear, and the following day’s newspaper headline which read: “Stray Injures Indy Knight, Hicks Changing Lances.”

Dishonorable Mention:
Wearing his new slacks from L.L. Bean, and entering the pen to feed his three big dogs their usual three cans of dog food, some of which ended up on his new pants, Kevin then left the house to attend a revival screening of ‘Serpico’ with Alpo chinos.

More later...

USA!...USA!...USA!...

2010-07-04T21:58:00.001-05:00

What a great week so far...

2010-07-03T13:37:00.002-05:00

I took part in my first Vacation Bible School this week.

What a blast!

The amount of effort it takes to put one of these on is amazing. Kelly was the director this year so I should know. She and her merry band were busy for weeks nay months in preparation. Sets, costumes, crafts, movies, snacks, games, etc. etc. etc.

They did a fantastic job and the kids had a ball. Almost as much fun as I did.

The theme was High Seas Adventure. God's word is amazing! I played a character named Sailor Jack. Kind of a goofball guy who has a quandary in his life that just so happens to coincide with that days lesson. Every time I had an issue, God's word would be just what I needed.

This was a very spiritual event for me. Seeing the kids learn about God and their enthusiasm for it. It was a sight to see.

Not only that but I can relate to Sailor Jack. I am somewhat of a goofball who has quandarys in my life who just needs to stop and listen. I need to gain my strength through Christ. I remembered that this week and it's something I hope I won't forget.

Just to hammer the lesson home, God did something for me yesterday too. To preface the story for those of you that don't know, I am a Jeffersonian Deist kind of a guy. By that I mean, I don't believe God has a direct hand in the daily goings on of our lives. I dread to bring this up because I know what you're thinking. I do believe God is omniscient, omnipresent the whole 9 yards. He is always in my heart. Always there. I just don't think he finds me a job.

Having said that I do believe in miracles which of course is Gods hand in our every day lives. But something we can't explain. That's why it is a miracle.

My philosophy could be due to a lack of faith. I don't know.

What I do know is yesterday I went out to do some yard work and get the pool ship shape. Finished my work and lit up a cigar. The rain came in so fast I couldn't get out from under the table and umbrella in the backyard fast enough...so I sat there. Under the umbrella. Smoking my cigar.

I listened.
I smelled.
I watched.
I felt.

The rain.

I prayed.
I cried.
I smiled.
I thanked.

The Lord.

For sending His word in the form of the rain.

Sailor Jack really needed it.

Liberal ideology...

2010-07-02T10:28:00.002-05:00

How did four Supreme Court justices wind up arguing against the Constitution?

The Supreme Court has made an individual right to gun ownership settled law, more than 220 years after the founders mistakenly believed they had settled the issue.

Some on the left were none too happy about the decision...

In their dissenting opinions, Justices John Paul Stevens and Stephen Breyer (joined by Ruth Bader Ginsburg and Sonia Sotomayor) worry that overturning gun control laws undermines democracy. If “the people” want to ban handguns, they say, “the people” should be allowed to implement that desire through their elected representatives.

What if the people want to ban books that offend them, establish an official church, or authorize police to conduct warrantless searches at will? Those options are also foreclosed by constitutional provisions that apply to the states by way of the 14th Amendment. The crucial difference between a pure democracy and a constitutional democracy like ours is that sometimes the majority does not decide.

Jacob Sullum from Reson magazine, notes that Stevens argued that firearms have a “fundamentally ambivalent relationship to liberty,” which is amazing from a jurist supposedly working within the Constitution. The document itself recognizes that a free people have the right to self-defense by owning firearms, an explicit rejection of any such ambivalence. In fact, they found the connection between gun ownership and liberty so unproblematic that they guaranteed the right of the people to keep and bear arms in the second explicit statement of uninfringeable individual liberties in the Constitution.

If the issue is that the right to gun ownership can be abused, well, so can all of the other rights. Part of the reason why gun owners need to keep their own weapons is precisely because gun ownership can be abused. While the Left side of the Court extols the ability of states to act as laboratories for social and legal innovation, they ignore the fact that the “experiments” in gun bans have proven without exception to be failures. Banning handguns and other firearms in Chicago didn’t keep guns out of the city; the laws just ensured that law-abiding citizens would be disarmed and at the mercy of those who would abuse gun ownership for criminal enterprises. Those hardest hit are citizens in urban areas, who are more likely to be poor and members of minorities, as well, who cannot rely on police to act as personal bodyguards at all times.

Effective Jan Brewer ad...very effective...

2010-06-26T20:26:00.001-05:00

Lesson for today...

2010-06-26T08:39:00.002-05:00

if you are a Democrat you can never be an idiot or a liar.

You simply misppoke.

Firts we have Blumenthal from Connecticut running for Senator. On more than one occassion he spoke of his time served in Vietnam. It turns out the guy has never set foot in Vietnam. He was in the military, Marine Corps Reserves after his 5 deferrments, but never spent a day in Vietnam. He was stationed in D.C.

You'd think this was something he'd remember. Especially at the military banquets and dinners at which he espoused his military career.

What's to worry? If you're a democrat, the media won't ask you about it or take you to task for it. It's all for the greater good. Google the Disclosure Act to see what I mean.

Now we have this mental giant Peggy West from Milwaukee who is all for a boycott of Arizona because of their immigration law. Her issue apparently is "... If this was Texas, which is a state that is directly on the border with Mexico, and they were calling for a measure like this saying that they had a major issue with undocumented people flooding their borders, I would have to look twice at this. But this is a state that is a ways removed from the border,".

You read that correctly.

She now claims she misspoke...Uh huh.

And why is Milwaukee Wisconsin boycotting Arizona anyway. The fact they are the only city in America to have elected a Socialist mayor may have something to do with it. But I tend to think too much cheese has hardened not only the arteries but the brain they feed.

Do you think if Dick Cheney and his wife were getting a divorce we may actually hear about it? I venture to guess we would probably know way more about Cheney than we ever wanted to.

Where are Tipper and Al Gore? The story was swept under the rug so fast some of you may not even know after 40 some odd years they separated. He may have had an affair.

I don't even want to think about that.

I don't care who you are...

2010-06-24T19:36:00.001-05:00

this video is awesome. Whatever your opinion of soccer this video is a must see.

America, baby!

For those of you that don't know...

2010-06-23T13:23:00.004-05:00

I tend to lean to the consevative side. Which pretty much puts me diametrically opposed to anything the Man-Child does, says, thinks, wants, wishes, longs for...you get the idea.

In the case of fairness, the decision he had to make this morning was one I do not envy. How would you like to have to make a decision about the leader of the troops in a war zone who criticezed you in Rolling Stone?...Rolling Stone? What is up with that? Why would they let Rolling Stone tag along for two weeks? That alone should be a means for dismissal.

And for those who say McChrystal was insobordinate; they are wrong. Insobordinate means he refused to follow orders. He never did any such thing. He just put his head too far up his butt.

Whatever the Man-Child decided he was not going to please everyone. If he kept McChrystal, he would hear it from the chain of command guys. If he let him go, he would hear from the we're at war guys. He can't win.

I tend to side with the chain of command guys. So I probably would have done exactly what the Man-Child did. I hope it is what is best for the country. If not, we'll go down together the Man-Child and I.

Interesting side note to this whole affair: Petraus has been tagged as the new CO in Afghanistan. Being asked by the Man-Child and accepting.

Do you remember about 2 years ago an ad run by MoveOn.org in the NYT that read "General Betray-us" A clever play on words by the leftists. Well the senate voted 77 to 25 to condemn the ad. One of the senators not voting was the Jr senator from Illinois. He said the resolution was " a stunt" and "By not casting a vote, I registered my protest against these empty politics."

That's right. It was...

The Man-Child

I think this shows you how much integrity Petraus has. His country asking him to do a job it deems necessary is more important than the petty man asking him to do it.

You see even in the face of agreement with the Man-Child I manage to find an angle.

Some may call that petty. I would.

I'm only human.

I read 4 stories today that really...

2010-06-22T17:44:00.004-05:00

pissed me off. Sorry for the language but, well, there you go.

The first was about a mexican drug cartel who has threatened local authorities in Nogales Arizona. The cops in Nogales made an off-duty bust of 400 lbs of marijuana. The cartel came back and said look the other way or else. Here's the story.

The second story involves a story that Obama is considering using an executive order to give amnesty to the 11-18 million illegals here in this country. Here's that story.

The third story was about the Mexican government suing Arizona for its immigration law. That story here.

The fourth story is the one that chaps my hide the most. And that is being polite. If this story is true and I don't see how it isn't, we have no choice to go down there and start blowing people away. I know it sounds harsh but it seems to me like they have beaten us to the punch. They are on our soil shadowing our police and threatening their lives. I think the drug war has taken a whole new turn. And a war is exactly what they should get. Read that disgusting story here.

I may have posted this once before...

2010-06-22T16:04:00.000-05:00

but it's pretty funny.

Another weekend come and gone...

2010-06-22T10:29:00.002-05:00

a good time had by all once again.

I love Fathers Day. If I've told one person I've told a million people, don't exaggerate...no that's not it...I was put on this earth to be a father. Yea, that's the ticket.

The one thing I love to do everyday is to put my kids to bed. Pulling up the blankets. Tucking them in. Knowing they are warm, safe and secure. Giving them a kiss good night and telling them I love them and they say it back to me.

It doesn't get any better than that.

No matter what happened that day; bad traffic, bad boss, bad meeting, whatever; your children running up to you when you come through the door at the end of the day, well, makes it all OK.

Unfortunately, there is no pill you can take to be a good dad. All you have are your experiences with your dad. The lessons he taught you. How he taught you those lessons.

The most vivid memories I have growing up are the vacations we used to take; Carpenteria, Yosemite, Bryce and Zion, Vancouver, Oregon etc. We spent a lot of time together the 7 of us. Shaped our whole lives.

I know that is why now it is very important to me for my family to vacation every year. These are the things the kids will remember. The beaches and the mountains. The time spent together.

Yep. I had a very good role model when I was a boy. Taught me what it was to be a man. I don't think it's a coincidence that my 3 brothers are excellent fathers.

We were all watching the same guy.

Pack mentality...

2010-06-16T14:22:00.002-05:00

what's up with that?

I actually find it fascinating. Something that is 180 degrees from my nature some people find second nature.

Let me set the scene: I am eating lunch outside in a parking lot which faces the street. At least a football field long with two rows of spaces and one driving lane down the middle. I am at the far end of the lot which has no other cars in it. None. Just me. A guy pulls in from the other end and drives down to where I am and parks 2 spots away from me!

There are probably 100 spots per row. A total of about 200 spots.

And he pulls into a spot 2 away from me!

A month or so ago the family and I go to Sonic to get an ice cream or some such. There are two people in the place. One on one side and we are on the other. A third call pulls in and parks right next to us. I just look at Kelly and you can see in her eyes she is praying I don't say anything stupid.

I didn't.

That is until they rolled down their windows and started smoking.

Smoking!

We had to roll up our windows and drive off.

What is it with people? These are the same folks who sit in the stall next to you when the one farthest from you is free too. Total disregard for the "one empty stall between" rule.

I scope out a place and make sure there is room for me before I have to inconvenience someone. Sometimes you can't help it. There just is no other place. Because I am who I am I still get a little perterbed at that situation but I know there is nothing else that could be done.

However when I am sitting in a stall or parked in a spot or sitting in a movie theatre with oodles of space around me, don't sit or park next to me.

If I can be embarrasing in a parking lot, imagine what I can do in a stall.

You can't make this stuff up...

2010-06-14T11:12:00.000-05:00

Seriously?

Jut got back from two days...

2010-06-12T08:38:00.002-05:00

at a Bed & Breakfast in Glen Rose. Had a great time. Very relaxing. It was 95 degrees out but sitting in an Adirondack chair under the shadows of enormous oak and spruce trees with a breeze blowing off the river made it seem quite comfortable. Enough so that I wasn't even sweating. And for those of you that don't know, we Pfaffenbergers sweat...a lot.

There were an inordinate amount of spiders there. Which leads to the next observation. Spiders are consistent, persistent what have you. No matter how many times the webs were knocked down they came right back and started spinning again. They are the Bill Clintons of the arachnid world.

I came to realize something on this trip. I think I enjoy the anticipation of the trip more than the actual getting away. I love to plan trips. Kelly and I went on a 2 week trip to New England years ago that I would have to say was my masterpiece. It was awesome. I planned our honeymoon to the San Juan Islands in the Pacific Northwest. Again, awesome. Don't worry I won't break my arm patting myself on the back. I love the feeling of excitement when during the work week I am reminded of the upcoming vacation. It is quite a mental relief amidst the hustle and bustle.

Don't get me wrong I love the actual vacation too but there is always something you have to do. Pack the car, drive the car, unpack the car. You don't think about these things when you are slaving away at the computer and the thought of the vacation dances into your brain. You have visions of chaise lounges on beach fronts. Little tiny umbrellas in foofoo drinks full of booze. Soft tropical breezes. Cool clear water. Tanned tone bodies.

Well, chaise lounges are a luxury for the chosen DINKS, Dual Income No Kids, popoulating the beach. The only umbrella I am worried about is sticking out of the ground waiting for the winner of the race between me and Harry McButtcrack from Hoboken. Foofoo drink = juice box. The breeze is soft so it doesn't come close to dampening the 95 degree heat. The cool clear water is tepid and you can't see your feet when standing up to your ankles. I'm tanned and Kelly is toned so together we would make a pretty good person.

We did.

Three of them.

Keep an eye on the drummer...

2010-06-06T14:15:00.001-05:00

This guy is a riot...

What a great week...

2010-06-04T21:28:00.003-05:00

Having said that I just received news that the great John Wooden has passed away. A little bit of me went with him.

RIP Coach!

Had a party on Sunday. Family and friends. Hoped everyone would have a good time. The last guests left at 11:00 pm so I'd say they did considering the party started at 2:00.

Barney Fife moment coming...Madison was one of 4 students to get the A honor roll designation. Plenty of A/B kids but only an elite few get the A only. She was also awarded the excellence in science award...taking after her old man.

I'm so proud. It's only a matter of time before we are splicing genes for the human genome project.

Swimming galore at our house. Madison is a fish. Reagan has no fear. Wants to jump off of everything. Ian had no fear until he stepped off the step with no floaties and sank. I jumped in fully clothed but Madison had already begun to help him up.

He was scared after that. We have him swimming by himself again but for some reason he won't get into the pool without Kelly or I holding his hand. He wears his floaties of course. His new motto is, "They're not sinkies; they're floaties!"

We were all in the pool one day and were doing something when we turned around and Ian was standing on the step with his bathing suit around his ankles peeing straight into the pool. That kid has no shame. And a good stream too.

Currently I am sitting poolside in our newly landscaped backyard smoking a stoag.

Enjoying life.

Thanking God.

Ready for tomorrow.

An actual billboard in Tucson...

2010-06-02T15:43:00.002-05:00

Just...Remember!...

2010-05-31T18:20:00.001-05:00

Executive Mansion,

Washington, Nov. 21, 1864.

Dear Madam,--

I have been shown in the files of the War Department a statement of the Adjutant General of Massachusetts that you are the mother of five sons who have died gloriously on the field of battle.

I feel how weak and fruitless must be any word of mine which should attempt to beguile you from the grief of a loss so overwhelming. But I cannot refrain from tendering you the consolation that may be found in the thanks of the Republic they died to save.

I pray that our Heavenly Father may assuage the anguish of your bereavement, and leave you only the cherished memory of the loved and lost, and the solemn pride that must be yours to have laid so costly a sacrifice upon the altar of freedom.

Yours, very sincerely and respectfully,

A. Lincoln

God Bless America!

Video of deaf baby hearing for the first time...

2010-05-28T17:23:00.001-05:00

If this doesn't bring at least a smile to your face, you're evil.

Huh?...

2010-05-27T12:28:00.001-05:00

It is no secret that many of us who reject Obama's neo-communist agenda have turned to the Founding Fathers for guidance; when you think your country's founding principles are under attack, it's natural to re-acquaint yourself with the writings of the extraordinary group of men who wrote our founding documents.

When we examine this genius cluster, George Washington is perhaps the best loved. Last week Glenn Beck recommended the four-year old, 1208-page tome, George Washington's Sacred Fire, which discusses pop culture fave topics like the religious beliefs of our first President. The book shot to number one on Amazon's bestseller list. It has recently been bumped to #2 by an R-rated Swedish detective series.

It was therefore understandable that a Boston Globe editorial felt the need to compare Washington and Jefferson unfavorably to...Bill Clinton.

George Washington's parents no doubt took pride in his childhood honesty, but therein may lie the reason he was among the least intellectual of the Founding Fathers. A Canadian study last week declared that children who lie are actually showing their mental acuity and creativity. "Parents should not be alarmed if their child tells a fib,'' Kang Lee, director of the Institute of Child Study at the University of Toronto, told the Telegraph of London. In fact, children who are making things up at age 2 have fast-developing brains, which portend greater intellectual achievements. Thomas Jefferson, whose genius sometimes led him down a twisty path around the truth, may have been an example. So might his mentally agile successor, William Jefferson Clinton. As for Washington - perhaps there's a new explanation for why he confessed, in the great Parson Weems legend, to chopping down the cherry tree: Maybe young George just couldn't come up with a good enough cover story.

It's amazing how many wrong ideas can be crammed into one short piece of writing: The "I cannot tell a lie" fable about the cherry tree proves that 10-year old George Washington was a bit of a dim bulb, while Bill Clinton's lies offer evidence that he is "mentally agile"? I didn't realize that Clinton was President at age 2.

As for the second most loved Founding Father, did you know that Thomas Jefferson was a liar who sometimes followed "twisty paths around the truth"? Apparently it's such common knowledge that no further explanation is required.

Now this, my friends, is a toilet paper ad...

2010-05-26T21:50:00.002-05:00

Ian, Ian, Ian...

2010-05-26T21:23:00.002-05:00

Last week we get through swimming and we come into the house. He begins to take off his bathing suit in the family room...

"Don't take off your suit here. Go upstairs and do it."
"Why?"
Because the painter is here and might see you."
(We were having our bedroom painted.)

A few minutes later he comes down the stairs. Walks to the door of our bedroom. Raises his arm and points with his thumb into the bedroom and says..."This guy doesn't want to see my tee-tee."

Today I am on my computer and I hear Ian start laughing and say "Daddy, I'm your huckleberry!"

I go into the bedroom and he is on my itouch watching Tombstone. Val Kilmer just got through shooting Johnny.

He pretty much watched the whole thing. He loves the western-cowboy-horses shoot em up stuff. Although the other day I caught him watching The Untouchables and he didn't seem to mind the cops-mafia-bootlegging shoot em up stuff either.

From the WTF department...

2010-05-26T21:20:00.000-05:00

They're builing a WHAT at ground zero?

Funny retort by Arizona...

2010-05-21T22:42:00.000-05:00

RIF

Can she take Handy Mandy with her?...

2010-05-21T13:25:00.003-05:00

I think you all know Dora but Handy Mandy, for those who don't know, is another cartoon character of Hispanic descent who haunts the Disney channel.

This cartoon was obviously made by the pro-illegal immigration crowd but it's still funny...

Yea, that Mother Theresa could be a real...

2010-05-21T13:14:00.002-05:00

This sounds like an obvious jazzy story for national news. Last September, the Empire State Building drew controversy (at least in anti-communist circles) for honoring the 60th anniversary of the communist revolution in China with red and yellow floodlights. But now, as Lou Young of WCBS-TV reports, the same brass at the Empire State Building refuse to honor saintly Mother Teresa with blue and white lights, the colors of her religious order. "It's kind of hard to be against Mother Teresa," said Archbishop Timothy Dolan.

The lighting would consist of a simple tribute in blue and white, the same colors used for a Yankees World Series win or an Israeli Independence Day. In this case it would be the colors worn by a crusader for the poor and a candidate for sainthood, the venerable Mother Teresa. Yet the people who own the Empire State Building said they won't pay this simple tribute in blue and white for the 100th anniversary of her birth this coming August, and they refuse to offer an explanation to people who made the application....

Is Mick Jagger a (gasp) conservative?...

2010-05-21T13:04:00.000-05:00

Mick Jagger Recounts Fleeing High Tax Rates in England, Success ‘Resented’ Unlike in America NewsBusters.org

I'm getting a little perterbed...

2010-05-19T19:59:00.002-05:00

I have a brother, who shall remain nameless, who has a blog. He posted this week for the first time in almost 2 months. A cute story about his youngest and the trials and tribulations of being such.

3 people commented on his blog...

After almost 2 months.

I have 19 posts in the month of May alone and do you know how many comments I have?

...

What's up with that? One of them is from someone I don't even know.

I realize most of my posts are political in nature and may be harder to comment on but I have a plethora of other subjects as well.

Cartoons

Personal stories

I have a Star Wars lego story for crying out loud. That's good stuff.

Even when I spill my guts I get squat.

I am as close to a girl as you can get without actually being one. I wear my heart on my sleeve. I worry about being color coordinated. I can act gay like nobody's business.

I mean come on people I need some feedback here. "You Suck!". "You Rock!".

Something

I realize this post may be a little petty, shallow and selfish but I did say...I was as...close...(don't got there)...to...a girl...as you...could...get...

Alabama politics...

2010-05-16T16:09:00.001-05:00

Gotta love it.

If this guy is on the level, he would have my vote.

Driving home from...

2010-05-15T18:46:00.002-05:00

seeing Robin Hood listening to Katrina and the Waves and I thought to myself..."Why in the heck are you listening to Katrina and the Waves?" So I changed the channel and one of my favorite songs was just finishing.

I hate it when that happens.

Robin Hood was good. Not great unfortunately. I love Russell Crowe. I think he's dreamy. But I wasn't impressed. The movie seemed to be more about what a bad ass Maid Marion was. Not that there's anything wrong with that. But I signed on for scalp splitting, arrow flying mayhem. Got some. Not enough.

The story was more about how Robin got his start. He actually fought with King John against the French.

The Catholic church was a villain here. And heck, it was only 300 years before the reformation. I guess they had to start somewhere.

Watched Edge of Darkness with Mel Gibson last night. That was OK too.

Plot line revolves around a cop, defense contractor and a Senator. The movie takes place in Massachusetts so naturally the senator was a Republican. Because in the past 40 years Mass has had no Republican senators. Zero. Zip. Nada. Nil. Zilch.

That kind of stuff is why I find it very hard to give my money to those bozos.

For those of you that don't know, I have 3 kids. Which means cartoons are on a lot. One thing I have noticed is the use of pigs as cartoon characters. More it seems recently. Olivia. Toot and Puddle.

What's up with that?

Have these people not seen Amityville Horror or read Animal Farm? Pigs are either the devils minion or communist. Personally, I don't know which is more frightening. I do know the only thing pigs are good for is bacon. And the occasional honey glazed ham. Maybe a pork chop now and then.

But cartoon characters? Never.

Why doesn't anyone care about the Soviet Document Archives?

2010-05-14T16:08:00.001-05:00

That’s the question Claire Berlinski asks in the latest issue of City Journal, but the answer is rather easy to surmise. Michael Moynihan wrote about the problem from a different angle in an excellent article for Reason last year, and various pundits have noted the dearth of admissions over the true nature of the Soviet regime in the period since the end of the Cold War. The archives gathered by Pavel Stroilov and Vladimir Bukovsky, among others, provide evidence in stark terms of the end result of collectivist impulses — and challenge the academic conclusions about the nature of Soviet leaders, especially Mikhail Gorbachev:

In the world’s collective consciousness, the word “Nazi” is synonymous with evil. It is widely understood that the Nazis’ ideology—nationalism, anti-Semitism, the autarkic ethnic state, the Führer principle—led directly to the furnaces of Auschwitz. It is not nearly as well understood that Communism led just as inexorably, everywhere on the globe where it was applied, to starvation, torture, and slave-labor camps. Nor is it widely acknowledged that Communism was responsible for the deaths of some 150 million human beings during the twentieth century. The world remains inexplicably indifferent and uncurious about the deadliest ideology in history.

For evidence of this indifference, consider the unread Soviet archives. Pavel Stroilov, a Russian exile in London, has on his computer 50,000 unpublished, untranslated, top-secret Kremlin documents, mostly dating from the close of the Cold War. He stole them in 2003 and fled Russia. Within living memory, they would have been worth millions to the CIA; they surely tell a story about Communism and its collapse that the world needs to know. Yet he can’t get anyone to house them in a reputable library, publish them, or fund their translation. In fact, he can’t get anyone to take much interest in them at all.

Then there’s Soviet dissident Vladimir Bukovsky, who once spent 12 years in the USSR’s prisons, labor camps, and psikhushkas—political psychiatric hospitals—after being convicted of copying anti-Soviet literature. He, too, possesses a massive collection of stolen and smuggled papers from the archives of the Central Committee of the Communist Party, which, as he writes, “contain the beginnings and the ends of all the tragedies of our bloodstained century.” These documents are available online at bukovsky-archives.net, but most are not translated. They are unorganized; there are no summaries; there is no search or index function. “I offer them free of charge to the most influential newspapers and journals in the world, but nobody wants to print them,” Bukovsky writes. “Editors shrug indifferently: So what? Who cares?”

The problem isn’t apathy as much as it is fear. The narrative among popular academics and media is that the Soviet Union collapsed out of a too-generous sense of glasnost and perestroika, with Mikhail Gorbachev as the benevolent national leader whose love of freedom inadvertently ended the Soviet empire. The documentation of the Kremlin’s activities and transcripts of Gorbachev’s own conversations put an end to that mythology. For instance, Berlinski quotes this passage from Politburo minutes of a discussion of the Tiananmen Massacre in 1989:

Lukyanov reports that the real number of casualties on Tiananmen Square was 3,000.

Gorbachev: We must be realists. They, like us, have to defend themselves. Three thousands . . . So what?

So what, indeed! What’s the death of 3,000 unarmed men and women when it comes to preserving the power of the dictatorial state? One must crack a few (thousand) bourgeois eggs to make the Communist omelette, after all. That comes to light again in a transcript of a Gorbachev conversation with a West German politician in which he defends a similar massacre of protesters in Tbilisi by Soviet troops.

These documents have the power to destroy the carefully constructed facade of Gorbachev by his Western apologists as somehow different from his Soviet predecessors. He was not; he could hardly have risen to the Politburo had he not been an advocate of totalitarian control. He had a much better sense of his enemies than his predecessors, and knew how to charm the media better than any of them. And charm them Gorbachev did, enough to get them to make the argument over the last 20 years that Gorbachev won the Cold War by dismantling the Soviet Union, rather than the obvious conclusion that the US won it by forcing the Soviets into an economic war they couldn’t possibly hope to win.

That is why the term “Nazi” rightly remains synonymous with evil, while “Communist” gets more of a pass. (When was the last time we saw a movie with a Communist villain? 1959?) The Soviet Communists killed tens of millions of people through malice and neglect over a far longer period of time, and that includes Mikhail Gorbachev, who spent decades working in that system. The documents saved at so much risk to these archivists would show that unequivocally — and that should prompt us to ask, as Berlinski does, why that seems to threaten so many in the media and academia to the point of attempting to ignore their existence.

This is Chris Christie...

2010-05-13T10:31:00.006-05:00

Governor of New Jersey. Republican. Funny.

Gov Christie calls S-L columnist thin-skinned for inquiring about his 'confrontational tone'

Stay Classy, Man-Child...

2010-05-12T09:15:00.002-05:00

When President Obama was asked if he would play a round of golf with his talk-radio nemesis Rush Limbaugh, the response, relayed by a top Democrat, was: "Limbaugh can play with himself."

This is according to Zev Chafets in his new book, "Rush Limbaugh: An Army of One," due May 25 from Sentinel.

Mark Steyn: Times Square bomber just overeager - Opinion - The Orange County Register

2010-05-10T13:11:00.001-05:00

Mark Steyn: Times Square bomber just overeager - Opinion - The Orange County Register

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