"Mm. Interesting."...

I don't know whether I am fascinated or disgusted. Maybe it would help if I explained. I saw those pictures of that tribe in South America that apparently had never had any contact with the outside world. I only saw the pictures of the tribesmen painted red and pointing bows and arrows at the intruding plane. Apparently hours before when the plane had no cameras on board, the plane came across this tribe and the women and children were outside playing and doing chores. The men were not painted red. They were just hanging out. Only after the plane came back were the women and children not seen and the men painted red.

On a Saturday morning show, CBS I think it was, they showed the pictures and this arrogant windbag behind the desk said "Mm. Interesting."

It's hard to imagine but what would your reaction be to something as disruptive as this in your life? These people don't know what a light bulb is. Phone, toilet, car, refrigerator, computer. Nada. Zip. Zilch. And apparently they are doing OK with it.

Stumbling across them I understand. Flying back to take pictures, I don't know. I understand the scientific part of it of course. It is fascinating to find a species to which I belong totally isolated from the world. I would love to see how they live, what they eat and all of that. But something just gnaws at me that this isn't right.

Remember a few years ago when that washed up actor who went to live with the grizzlies was found eaten by said grizzlies? Well, they went in and put down the offending grizzly. So, man intrudes on animals habitat gets eaten by said animal and the animal is at fault? For what, being an animal? Those kind of things bother me to no end. I guess it's our arrogance. I am in no way an environmentalist but I am a conservationist. I think part of that is knowing when to leave well enough alone. If a guy thinks he can co-habitate with bears, so be it. If he ends up being Sunday breakfast, so be it.

Getting back to the arrogant windbag, taking into account these people have never had any contact with the outside world, sure maybe another tribe like themselves but not any civilized world, what do you think their reaction was to a huge non-wooden object actually flying in the sky? Well, they hid their women and children and painted themselves red and grabbed bows and arrows. Sounds like we scared the bejeezus out of them.

It looks like war.

We totally turned this societies world upside down. Everything they thought they knew has now been turned on its head. They fear for their lives and are willing to fight to the death to defend themselves. And all the desk-jockey can think of to say is "Mm. Interesting."

This reminds me of a Simpson's episode. Doesn't everything. Homer gets in a plane to escape a gambling debt and the plane takes him to South America where some missionaries are working with a local tribe. In the course of the show the volcano begins to erupt so Homer tries to finish the church they are building to appease the gods. He tells the tribesmen:

"You sinners must help me finish this church."

"Sinners? Since when?"

"Since I got here." says Homer.

I'm not equating missionaries with what's going on here but I hope you get the point.

I think I made up my mind. I'm disgusted.

Working for "the man"...

I just went for my daily venti mocha frapuccino. The lady at the register was quite chatty today. Why do they do that? Sometimes I just want to get my drink and go without having to divulge my life story. Anywho, she told me her mother was laid off 4 years ago by EDS and it was the best thing that ever happened to her. I, getting caught up in the moment, told her of my similar situation a few years ago and how well it worked out for me. The whole conversation started by her asking me what I was going to do today and I told her go swimming with my kids. How we got to being laid off I'll never know.

She then said:

"I hate corporate America."

I said:

"Said the lady working at Starbucks." Hoping of course she would catch the irony.

She didn't.

I don't know about you but I consider Starbuck's to be pretty much the epitome of the corporate world.

Gotta go be back in a minute.

I'm sure at one time when it was a one store liberal coffee house full of turtleneck-wearing, horned-rim-glass-sporting, finger-snapping-approval beatnik wannabees it was the antithesis of corporate America.

But now...not so much.

Wow! Just Wow!...

I should have died when I was 5 according to this green-friendly site.

This site is obviously geared toward children. What mental giant thought this was a good idea? Exploding pigs? Telling you when you should die? Geez Louise.

Tin foil hat alert...

For those of you not familiar with the tin foil hat reference, it is used as a derogatory term for those of us who are conspiracy theorists. It comes from the guys who would wear tin foil on their heads so the aliens couldn't read their minds. That is absolutely true.

I just don't like giving out my phone number to the clerks at the register in Babies 'R' Us or Bed Bath and Beyond. I don't know why. It makes me feel...violated. I know they don't have some big database of phone numbers that they use to call people and if someone answers they hang up and mark that they were home at that certain time of the day and call back many times to record their comings and goings.

But they do.

Why else would the Babies/Bath clerk look at me as if I had lobsters crawling out of my ears when I politely respond no thanks to their request for my phone number?

They get paid by the phone number you know. The more numbers the more money and points can be accumulated so as to receive recommendation and citation from said multi-national conglomerate which in turn uses the phone numbers to attain massive amounts of consumer data on the unknowing public which they will one day use to manipulate worldwide financial data and ultimately take over the world. Either that or they want me to know when the Huggies go on sale.

I will buy my next car at a place where the salesman doesn't tell me his job depends on the survey they will be sending me.

"Make sure you mark everything exceptional."

"Even if it wasn't?" (said chucklng nervously)

...

...

"I'll do as you say."

Too much pressure for me. I don't want to be responsible for a guys job who I just bought a car from. I only want to be responsible for a guys job who I didn't just buy a car from.

(If there are children reading this please understand that I in no way condone the ending of sentences in prepositions. It's just in this case, for the comedy, I thought it was warranted.)

This is pretty amazing...

I'm not a big dance guy but this is quite unique and unnerving at the same time.

http://view.break.com/507504 - Watch more free videos

Nothing Special...

Why is it that 5:00 comes a heck of a lot faster on a holiday than it does on a regular work day? It must be some glitch in the time-space continuum. We gotta get that fixed.

"Time space continuum" is a phrase that has been following me lately. That and the word "meme". By following me, I mean a phrase or word that I am hearing and/or reading a lot of lately. I don't remember having heard or seen it that much before, if at all, but all of a sudden in the past few months it is everywhere. Meme this and meme that. And the space time contiuum must be tired because it is everywhere.

I don't know where that came from. Oh well...

Often when I contemplate what to right, or do I mean write, on this blog I try to think of something my kids did that is special. I have come to realize that whatever they do is special. Whether it is Madison telling me she loves me or Ian saying "Teg you, daddy" when I bring him his dinner or Reagan pulling my beard when I feed her; these are the days to remember. They grow up so fast. Having them totally dependent on you is not only a good thing, it is a special thing as well. Now is the time to form the bonds of love and trust and forgiving that they will depend on throughout their lives. Something I know Kelly and I will provide in spades hoping that they understand why we do it as they grow older and begin to take control of their own lives.

That is my meme.

More pics of the kiddos...

God Bless Our Fallen Soldiers...

“It is foolish and wrong to mourn the men who died. Rather we should thank God that such men lived.”
-- General George Patton

In Flanders Fields
John McCrae, 1915.
In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.
We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved and were loved, and now we lie
In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.

This weekend, let us remember those men and women who have paid the ultimate sacrifice protecting our nation from foreign threats.
It humbles me to think some 20 year old who never even knew I existed gave his/her life so I can watch my children grow up in a country where freedom is king.

The Ian vocablulary quiz...

Ian is about 2 1/2 now and he seems to have started a growth spurt. The legs don't have that layer of baby fat on them anymore. His vocabulary, not to mention his body, is growing by leaps and bounds. It is a hoot to sit and listen to him just jabber on about the topic at hand. The guy is definitely opinionated. He gets that from Kelly you know.

Anywho, I thought we would play a vocabulary game with Ian's words. Here goes:

When you want to go swimming you go to what? That is correct, "a poo". (Not to be confused with the Quik-E Mart clerk.) It's always "a poo". Which of course means "the pool".

What is Mickey Mouses friends name who...that...is a dog? Right again, "Goopy". I love that one.

What pet do you walk on a leash? If you said "goggy", you are correct.

This one's a little harder. What is the name of the vehicle that has a big scoop in front that can move dirt from one place to another? "Tractra". You're good.

What is a "bee trah"? That of course is a big truck. We see many of those on the freeways. Many.

He also has a great way of making you think what he wants to do is your idea.

"Sully and My"

"Do you want to watch Monsters Inc.?"

"OK"

It's the way he says the last OK that does it. He puts the emphasis on the O. The O he hits and the K comes down not only in volume but tone as well. I just dread the day when he hits the K instead of the O.

"Please go clean your room"

"O-K."

Last one for a while I promise...

We can all rest easy. The U.N. is on the case.

Sorry, another political one...

What is it about private they don't understand?

This one's political. Be thee warned says I...

Read this. Then we'll talk.

The decision was 7-2.

7 to 2.

Two supreme court justices actually thought this was a bad idea. Writing for the majority:

Justice Antonin Scalia said the law contains safeguards to ensure it is not used against simulations of child sexual activities or movies using adults posing as kids.

Well, thank God they aren't infringing on the rights of those that want to simulate child sexual activity. Lord knows we don't have enough children simulating sexual acts on TV and the movies. Not to mention the quote was from Antonin Scalia one of my idols on the court. (Clarence Thomas is the other. Both better men than I.)

The critics of this law were worried that if this law passed we may never get to see movies like the recent Dakota Fanning movie where she is brutally raped. No big deal you say. Well, she's 11. Even the people who reviewed the film said it was a little much. But it's art. An 11 year old being raped is art. The Passion of the Christ was just violent for violence sake though. No art there.

Yes the law was upheld. Which is a good thing. But to have people actually think any form of child pornography even simulation in a movie should be protected under the first ammendment, boggles my mind. I even saw one critic say that a grandparent sending pictures of the grandkids over the internet with the heading, "Great pics of grandkids in bed" could be tried under this law. I'll tell you what, we'll put them in the same cell with all of the citizens we have arrested and tried under the "illegal wiretapping" program. That would be a grand total of ZERO!

The older I get the more I am beginning to realize I am being called to help the children. There needs to be some legislation passed about harming a child. Mandatory sentences of at least 30 years and a cell mate named Tiny.

Tiger Woods I ain't...

Played golf today in the church tournament. We had a good turnout. It was a perfect day for it too. 85 sunny and just a breeze. The team that won shot a 14 under. That's good to say the least.

One thing I noticed today is when the team is looking for a ball the guy who hit it is always about 30-40 yards ahead of all the other guys. Unfortunately in my case, it's always the other guys that find it.

What a frustrating game. In a round, a golfer such as myself may hit 95 shots. Maybe 10 of those are good shots. A little less than 10%. Why is that percentage high enough to keep you coming back? If you shot 10% in basketball, you wouldn't play. If you hit .100 in baseball, you wouldn't play.

Frustrating? Quite!

One of those moments...

Tonight I was sitting watching my children. Madison and Ian were playing some sort of dancing game together while Reagan the 6 month old was rolling back and forth on the floor. I was watching this scene unfold and for some reason I became very emotional. I didn't know why. I had watched this scene unfold many times and knew how it was going to end; usually with Ian crying. But for some reason tonight I was truly touched by the scene.

Then it hit me.

We had the music channels on and had it turned to the 80's channel. Rick Springfield's "Jesse's Girl" was on. For those of you that don't know, this was a very popular song in our high school days. Now it wasn't the song that made me emotional because if you know the song it doesn't invoke that kind of emotion. It brought back memories that induced that kind of emotion.

Music is a huge emotional trigger for me. Any music I hear pretty much takes me right back to where I was when I heard it. Telephone Line by ELO reminds of Chris Salvatori's house in California. The first time I remember hearing that kind of doo-wop in rock and roll form. Reminiscing by Little River Band was on the radio the first day I woke up for school here in Texas. I still get a knot in my gut when I hear that. Saved by Zero by The Fixx reminds of Friday night high school days. Devo, Queen, The Knack, Bourgeouis Tagg, Level 42, Seal. The list is endless. I could go on and on but suffice it to say music is a large part of my life.

Who would have thought when I was in high school pining for Kelly that 23 years later I would be sitting in our home watching our children play? I dreamt of being married to Kelly in high school but had no way of knowing that it would be this wonderful.

Sitting there watching my children and knowing that Kelly and I brought these beautiful little people into the world was an overwhelming sensation. If I've said it once I've said it a million times. Don't exaggerate. No...wait...it's I am truly blessed.

If I had a machine that could have stopped that moment in time, I would have used it. But then again, it's probably a good thing I don't have one because I probably would have used it already.

A little under the weather...

I'm not 100% today. I have a fever and am congested. Kelly was sick for about two weeks. Don't know if I caught it from her or not but regardless I am weary. Here's a question, do we have fever because of the illness or to combat it? In other words, is the fever induced by what ails us to make us feel even worse or is it our bodies own defenses that raise the thermostat so a foreign body that thought it would be thriving at 98.6 degrees suddenly finds itself in a scathing sauna of 101 thus rendering it useless and ready for a Margarita? Either way it's OK you wake up with yourself.

I have really been hankering for the Beatles lately. Not arguably the greatest band ever sans Jellyfish. On second thought, Jellyfish had some major Beatles influences along with SuperTramp, Queen and Cheap Trick so the Beatles are still tops. I have been trying to come up with a top 10 list of Beatles songs. Impossible. Although a few that seem to make all the lists are She's Leaving Home, Eleanor Rigby and We Can Work it Out. As it so happens, Rubber Soul, Revolver and Sgt Peppers are all favorites of mine. Oh who am I kidding, they're all favorites of mine.

I think this fever is getting to me. With that I'll leave you with this.

Ducks are people too...

Last week we realized we had a duck nest on our front lawn. (which is actually Asian Jasmine) We knew this because there was a duck sitting below our large elm tree. She was sitting on her eggs; about 10 of them. It became a family ritual to go look at the duck in the evening and see if she had moved. Friday, no movement. Saturday, no movement. And that included the tree guys who came to cut down a large branch on that elm tree that was broken in the storm we had earlier that week. They inverted a wheelbarrow on top of her to protect her and still she did not move. Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, well you get the idea.

We looked out yesterday and she was gone. Nothing but a lot of little feathers everywhere to mark their coming into this world. I have images of her swimming in the pond across the street with 10 little ones imprinted on her furry bobo. One happy family.

I wonder how she'll take the first day of kindergarten?

Our first day of school...

is rapidly approaching. Madison and Mommy went to the elementary school at the end of the street and registered Madison for kindergarten. She is very excited. She went to the school library while Kelly was doing the paperwork and read a few books. She was impressed with the stacks and can't wait to get there to read them all.

With her excitement comes our trepidation.

She is growing up.

As much as I've tried, there is nothing that will stop it. She soon will be making friends and have a whole other world outside of this house that we won't be a major part of. Sure we'll know what's going on and how she's doing but for the majority of the day she will be on her own, building her mind, building relationships, building confidence all on her own.

I know she's only 5 but here is where the rubber hits the road. She begins to make decisions on her own. I guess we'll see if what we have been teaching her is sticking. I have faith in her. I know she'll be alright.

I just wonder if I will be.

That's my girl...

Yesterday eldest was making a card for one of her grandmothers when she asked how to spell her sister's name. I brought her into my office and pulled a book off the shelf. I pointed at the picture of the man on the cover.

"Who's that?"

"Ronald Reagan"

"That's absolutely right. What's the name of the book?"

"Reagan"

"Right again"

"Thanks Daddy."

5 years old and she can read like a 3rd grader. But best of all, she can pick out a picture of Dutch himself.

That's my girl.

Happy Mother's Day!...

Talk about the law of unintended consequences. Little did I know the way I celebrated Mother's Day would be a point of contention in our marriage for years. Let me rephrase that, because of my ignorance I assumed, and you know what they say about people who assume, everyone celebrated Mother's Day the same way I did and when I found out that wasn't the case I handled it in my own tactful way, I made fun of those who did it differently. Namely my wife.

I'm a boob. I'm a big fat boob.

You see, I am of the ilk that you buy presents for your mother on mother's day. Kelly celebrates all mothers. Which of course is a perfectly legitimate way to do it. But me being, well, me, thought anything done differently is wrong not just different.

Looking back on it, man, I was a goof. Making such a mess out of something that is not that big of a deal. I still feel that Mother's day is for celebrating your mother not all mothers. But at least now Kelly can live with me

In the car on the way back from school Madison asked me if I had bought a present for mommy for mother's day. I said "No."

"Why not?"

"Because she's not my mommy. She's yours."

"Oh. That makes sense."

Chuckle. Chuckle. Can you say, indoctrination?

Having said all of that, I would be remiss if I didn't tell Kelly I...just interrupted by said wife telling me to quit being anti-social. I am writing this at her mother's house at which we are celebrating mother's day...thank God every day that she is the mother of my children. I am truly blessed.

More pics of the younguns...

Madison

Ian

Reagan

All of them

My question here is...

Why are these nuns voting for a pro-abortion candidate in the first place?

Pics of the kids...

These are not the most recent pictures but you get the general idea of just how gosh darn cute our kids are. This one is of Madison and Ian. More to come...

Coolest. Commercial. Music. Ever...

Good Grief...

I wonder how many kids this guy has?

I wonder if this ground breaking research was federally funded?

Human Nature...

Is it human nature to be thoughtful of others or look out for #1? I don't mean to suggest that the two are mutually exclusive but you get my point. I don't know what makes me think of that except on the drive home tonight there were more BMW drivers than normal. Let me explain, a BMW driver (beemer) is one that pretty much doesn't care about others or traffic laws. If it behooves the beemer to do something, he does it regardless of the consequences. You know the type. There is an on or off ramp that always backs up on the morning commute. You have those that get in line dutifully and those that drive in the middle lane as far as they possibly can and dart in at the last minute causing those behind him not only in the middle lane but also the exiting lane to slam on their brakes. Beemers. I'm just glad the kids are not in there with me when I see that. It ain't pretty.

Everybody's good. Kelly is getting better and thinner. She is doing great on that front. She looked good before but now it's just an embarrassment of riches. Madison is as inquisitive as ever. What's the record for the most questions asked in a day? Ian just doesn't give a hoot. No amount of threatening or bargaining or time outs phase that kid. he just keeps on smiling and doing what he does. Did I mention Reagan was a good pooper. She also has a wonderful smile. She now rolls all over the place. This was quite a rambling but nobody reads this thing anyway so who cares.

Good bye and God Bless.

Bottles, Ballet and Black Eyes...

What an eventful weekend we had. Madison had her dance recital on Sunday. Good Show! Tut Tut! She received her 3 year participation trophy. Very well deserved I might add. (Said the beaming father) She has excellent rhythm and is very graceful for a 5 year old. Heck, OK I'll say it she is very graceful for a 9 year old. Speaking of 9 year olds, is it just me or is it unnerving to watch pre-pubescent children dance as if they, well, weren't pre-pubescent children? I'm no prude but come on! I blame the Bratz dolls. Madison already knows those dolls will not be allowed in this house. As far as I can tell, the only use for those dolls is to teach our young ladies how to dress like hookers.

Reagan just keeps on eating. At almost 6 months she doesn't do much more than that, except dispose of waste; at which she excels. That's my girl.

Ian just keeps on banging himself up. Last night he's watching a movie in the bedroom with Madison and we hear Madison say "Oh No!". Wait for it...Ian begins to wail. Apparently he took a header off the bed on which he was jumping. D'OH! He struck his eye on something on the way down and now he has a shiner Rocky would be proud of. It hasn't seemed to phase him since he fell off the bed tonight doing exactly the same thing and bonked his head. Now before anyone goes and calls CPS let me know how you handled your 2 year old son OK?

Thanks for dropping by. Good bye and God Bless.

A Beautiful Sunday Morning!

It is clear and about 55 degrees. A perfect morning for the unwashed bitter masses to go do some clinging to religion.

Seriously, the Sunday morning ritual of dressing the children for church is something I look forward to. Seeing them in their Sunday best does a heart good. Sunday is a good day. Church in the morning, home for a nap and then everybody goes back to church, except me. I am Catholic so once a Sunday is all I am used to. It does give me a 2 1/2 hour window of alone time. A nice respite, I must say. I feel almost guilty that Kelly doesn't get the same privilege. She is a much better person than I so it probably has never crossed her mind. (Pausing for audible groans) Of course, I know it has. It's just that it is very hard to do with our schedules. One Saturday I will take the kids and go to Grandma and Grandpa's. The ony problem with that is they would probably rather see her than me. And they are my parents. Oh well, we'll just keep trucking along and play it by ear. Have a great Sunday.